Developing Your Strength through Confidence
So much of being successful in business is about self confidence, that if you’re not the most confident person in the world – it can feel like the whole industry is against you. Perhaps you’ve had more than a few disastrous interviews in the past, or maybe most of your interviews appear to go well on the day but never result in anything. Do you find it hard not to fidget when you’re nervous? What about speaking – do your words get caught in your throat when you’re anxious?
Whilst it’s completely natural to feel nervous in high pressure situations – you shouldn’t have to with crippling self confidence issues and you don’t have to. There are ways you can conquer those voices in your head that tell you you’re not good enough. There are clear, direct steps that you can take to squash those voices and replace them with a new found confidence.
If you’ve got a big job interview or presentation scheduled and you can afford the extra expense – buy yourself a ‘success outfit.’ If you it makes you look good, it will make you feel good. The experts at Pick The Brain point out that it doesn’t have to be expensive, it just has to be something that it feels really great to wear. It can be a snazzy new power suit, a pair of shoes, a new tie or even a new haircut – it doesn’t matter as long as it makes you feel good. Never wear anything you don’t feel comfortable with. Whilst a business outfit does have to fit certain criteria, it doesn’t have to be something you really dislike.
People are always stunned at just how much difference good posture can make. It has become natural for human beings to remained slumped – televisions and computers have seen to this. Most of us no longer remember what it feels like to stretch our spines out fully, to walk with a straight back and neck. Try it and you’ll be amazed at how different it feels. At first, it will seem unnatural and even a little artificial but after a while it will become second nature. You’ll feel much taller and much more confident about yourself. You’ll also have a much healthier spine!
It sounds like a an obvious piece of advice but here it is – positive thinking leads to positive results. If you go into a job interview expecting to fail, chances are you will, says Amy Carlson from MindTools.com. What employers want is a candidate who appears to do the picking, rather than the being picked. The reality might be different but this first impression is important. Avoid appearing arrogant but don’t undersell yourself. Let a potential employer or client know that he or she would be lucky to have you on their team by speaking clearly, mentioning other opportunities you may have and explaining why you’d choose this job over any other. If you don’t succeed – don’t analyse what went wrong or what you failed to do. Be comfortable with not knowing why they didn’t pick you and move on to the next opportunity.
Accept Your Insecurities
This is a difficult step but it is achievable, says WikiHow.com expert Christina Spillane. You won’t ever be truly confident if you can’t first accept your weaknesses. Many self-help courses advise insecure individuals to hide their problems and simply fake confidence until it becomes real. It won’t work and if it does it won’t work for very long – those self confidence demons will come back to haunt you if you ignore them. The trick is to simply accept them for what they are. So you’re aren’t ever going to be the best public speaker in the world – it doesn’t matter, as long as you try hard to be as good as you can be. Accept your weaknesses so that you can build on them. Ask for help from people who are good at public speaking, read books and websites on how to improve, even try talking to yourself in the mirror. If you can come to terms with your insecurities and realise that they’re a natural part of you – you’ll be a much happier, much more confident individual.
Dean May is a life coach and personal skills tutor. He recommends www.speak-first.com for effective, reliable personal impact skills, advice and courses. Dean loves watching someone develop from being nervous and shy into someone who can stand in front of a crowd confidence.