History tells us that Benjamin Franklin wanted to befriend a person who did not really like him. This person was looking for a rare book, which Franklin had. When Benjamin learned about this, he let this person to borrow this rare book, and when the book was returned to the owner, Benjamin simply thanked him. As a result, they became best friends.
As Franklin used to say: “Those for whom you’ve done good once, will be ready to respond with much more good than you offered”…
2. Try asking for more than you actually need to get.
This idea is very simple and is akin to trading on the market. This will never fail to work for you. You have to augment your needs if you are of interest to someone. First, you will most likely get refused. Do not give up, and give it some time. In 95% of cases, the person who are interested in you will eventually respond and offer a little less than you originally asked for, but it is guaranteed to be higher than you initially wanted to receive.
3. Conditioned desire to help
This idea is very similar to the previous one. In order to make someone to have an authentic and willful desire to help you, ask them once to do something for you that they may not be capable of doing. Having been refused, you have created for yourself a person who will feel owing to you. Most likely, they will feel like helping you other times because they will have a guilty feeling of not being able to help in the first place.
4. Always flatter
Flattering is ubiquitous. For starters, learn to understand that flattery should look natural, otherwise it may bring more negative outcomes than positive.
If you try to play along to someone who has a high self-esteem, then you have better chances in succeeding. People of this type love themselves and love flattery, and they do not seem to notice it. But those who have low self-esteem, may see trickery and deceit when you try to make them feel better.
When you want to be liked by someone, try to mimic them. Individuals possessing these traits are always treated by society as chameleons, when it is noticeable how they constantly change and adjust to each new individual they meet. However, this skill can be a useful tool to attract the right people who are of interest to you.
This principle is very common among comedians and masters of parody. All of the celebrities who have been parodied on TV screens are often good friends to these actors and comedians.
6. Ask for mercy from those who are tired
When someone is tired, he or she is more responsive to your requests. The answer lies in the fact that when people get tired, they are exhausted not only physically, but often mentally. If your boss is tired, he or she can easily allow you to finish your work the next day, which you should finish on time and with quality. This will add more respect and praise from your boss. Mainly because you kept your promise and integrity.
7. Begin by asking for small favors
Quite simply, ask for a small favors in the beginning, and you will likely open the gate for more credit. According to this principle, people often become dependent while participating in volunteerism. For example, at first you may be asked to take part in the movement against deforestation, which you support, then respond to more and more requests. It is a small favor, but you are gradually conditioned to give more. Suddenly, you are ready to support efforts against deforestation in distant Tanzania or join some “green” party and make contributions.
8. Try not to correct people if they are wrong
In his world-known book, Dale Carnegie suggests not to chastise people for their apparent human errors, at least not when you have just discovered those. If you are concerned with other people’s wrongfulness, approach it very carefully. Even if you are faced with a whiner, who blames his troubles on everybody but himself, do not shout it in his face. Try to agree with his opinion for the time-being, and then gradually try to change this viewpoint. Otherwise, you may face the risk of becoming his worst enemy.
9. Repeat phrases and expressions of people who are important to you
This principle resembles the principle of “chameleon”, when people mimic gestures and facial expressions of the person, whom they are interested in or whom they value. Words can be pleasant to the ear, if they sound like an echo. Try saying what this person has already mentioned, what he had already played in his head.
10. Nodding helps
Scientists discovered that when people nod while listening to someone, they most likely tend to agree with the speaker. They also found that when someone nods in front of someone speaking, the person who speaks, much like a parrot, will repeat the same words over and over again. Thereby, nodding provokes listener’s unconditional agreement.