If you want to make sure you are never noticed, stand out, or achieve anything momentous, just follow these sure-fire tips to be one with those around you.
1. Never have original ideas
If you want to be one with the crowd, it’s important to never have any original ideas. If you do find yourself having pesky brainwaves, be sure to keep them to yourself. You will never blend in with those around you if you don’t go along with the boring ideas of others.
Don’t risk sharing your great ideas in case they fail. And even if your great idea works out, it will get you a lot of attention and you don’t want others to be jealous of you. So remember, you don’t want to be original – just be safe.
2. Always give way to others
The surest way to stand out from the crowd is to disagree with others. Even though you may have a great point of view, don’t argue with others. If someone comes up with an idea you think could be disastrous – keep quiet. Okay, so you might save your colleagues from a lot of problems if you argue for a better idea, but it’s risky. You might lose friends if you are too assertive.
Others might feel threatened by your bold behaviour. You might get a promotion, which could mean more responsibility.
Instead, play safe and be one with everyone else so you can just merge into obscurity. At least this way you will never have to take any blame – or praise.
3. Don’t be quirky
Resist the temptation to be individual in your style, tastes, and behaviours. This will help you to go unnoticed. Even if you love those funky shoes or that cool tie, resist the temptation to buy them and choose something more sober instead. If your colleagues wear flat shoes, you should too.
When your friends order white wine, don’t order a whisky sour. If your friends are only interested in the next pay rise and pub crawl, so should you be. So if you thought the film you just saw was wonderful, don’t let on if your friends found it pretentious and boring.
Research the most popular TV shows, books, films and activities so you never get ahead of the crowd. Above all, just try to be normal.
4. Never make friends with unusual people
Even if you are fascinated by that quirky new guy at school or in the office, never be tempted to sit with him at lunch. You risk everyone noticing you and calling you odd if you do.
You might also pick up all sorts of new ideas and opinions that threaten your place in the crowd. If the new person goes on to great things, thank your lucky stars that you remained safe and anonymous.
5. Never offer to help others
If someone in your workplace or friendship group asks for help, be careful about your response. Being helpful can draw unwanted attention. Others might see you as sucking up for a start. You might also cause all sorts of jealousies if you help one person more than another.
If you see a situation where your help is required, do your best to slope out of the room as quickly as possible. Helping others can get you noticed and appreciated – and that’s the last thing you want.
In essence, to blend in, you just have to make sure you never do anything that might make you stand out.
Avoid having your own opinions, values and passions and just go along with what everyone else is doing. If you follow these sure-fire tips to be one with the crowd, I promise you will never do anything remarkable with your life.
