Having a charismatic personality means understanding the delicate balance between confidence and humility. Everyone enjoys the company of such a person.

One of the best traits to have is charisma. While it might not be easy to understand by many people, for those who get it, it’s invaluable. Finding a balance that clearly defines the difference between cockiness and confidence means all the difference in the world. In that balance is where you want to be in order to truly be a good individual.

How to recognize a charismatic personality?

A winning personality void of egotistical intent but filled with love and kindness is what our world needs today. We need more people filled with true charisma. But who are these people? How do we recognize the charismatic personality?

Revealing traits

1. Substance

True charismatic people possess substance behind their initial charm. You may meet someone who is incredibly charming and warm, but if they aren’t truly charismatic, this charm will erode into selfish motivation. With substance, there is a depth to that charm – it’s a true intention to offer your best to your fellow man.

2. Presence

To have a strong presence is not just about being in the present moment, physically. When charisma is present within you, you are able to give someone else 100% of your attention when they are conveying a message.

Think about it this way. How important to you is what you have to say? It’s important, isn’t it? So, one trait of charisma is being able to hear every piece of information and understanding that all of it is important to the one speaking or needing help.

3. Good eye contact

A charismatic personality exudes confidence. This confidence often shows through good eye contact. When you make eye contact during presentations or even when simply meeting someone new, you help them focus on what you’re saying, thus understanding and retaining more information.

You will know that someone has charisma when they hold good eye contact without making situations uncomfortable.

4. Listening skills

Many times, in a conversation, one person holds the spotlight. Although it can be rather selfish, most people don’t realize they’re hogging all the attention. Instead of listening to someone speak, most people are already planning their next words.

A good healthy conversation, however,  involves paying attention to what each other says, I mean really paying full attention. Charismatic people do this – they actually listen to what you’re saying. They are invaluable friends. They even listen more than they speak in all conversations.

5. Humility

Being humble is hard to some, but to charismatic people, it seems to come naturally. Humility is a well-known trait of selflessness, offering the best to others even when having to sacrifice themselves for others.

In fact, the most charismatic types of personalities have little to no arrogance at all. Humility will be easy to recognize when meeting charismatic people. Just watch for their constant effort to help and their amazing ability to accept when they are wrong.

6. Maturity

The person with charisma is mature. They place wisdom at a higher standard than knowledge itself. While so many of us possess intellect, few really have the ability to utilize logic and life experience like the charismatic personality.

True maturity shows through the charismatic person’s ability to make wise decisions, accept responsibility, and be a good influence on others struggling to be better versions of themselves. They will often be recognized as people wise beyond their physical age.

7. Power

Some personalities display kindness and beauty, while this particular personality displays power too. Now, mind you, this power I speak of is not a selfish type of power. It’s more like having an incredible influence over those in high positions.

But do charismatic people use this power for self-gain? Not usually, they mostly have this power unknowingly or they don’t try to use it. It’s more like something that just resides within that gets noticed and utilized. Using power for yourself and being a powerful influence are completely different things. True power shows through charisma.

8. Warm

A personality with charisma is a warm personality. This means they are approachable. Unlike other personalities where you feel nervous, the person with charisma makes you feel accepted, genuinely cared for, and intelligent. They never downplay your knowledge by showing off their own.

It’s as if they come towards you with open arms, welcoming everything you have to say. This warmth cannot be copied by those who aren’t charismatic people. It is a rare trait.

If you want to be more charismatic, here’s what you do:

1. Listen better

As I stated above, charismatic personalities truly listen during communication. If you want to be more like this, you have to practice listening more and speaking less. No, it’s not easy at all.

I have a horrible problem with just listening to what others have to say without constantly formulating my own words during their speaking. I also get overly excited about my own life and experiences that I often eclipse others when conversating. This is really bad, and yes, I must improve.

This is true with most people. We must learn to listen better if we want to improve our own charisma.

2. Take less/give more

Do not be selfish. Spend more of your time helping and giving to others, and less time taking things you believe you deserve. To physically be more charismatic, maybe you can help with a charity or do things for your neighbors.

It takes practice moving more into a selfless nature considering the world is always wanting us to take for ourselves in order to survive. So giving is a huge way of improving charismatic aspects of your personality.

3. Embrace change

Change isn’t easy, but to be more charismatic, you have to learn how to adapt to whatever is happening around you. At first, learn how to accept the ideas and opinions of others instead of judging their beliefs. Everyone is an individual and deserves the same respect, even when you don’t agree with them.

Accept a change of thought, a change of environment if necessary, and even a change in your personal life. People with positive power can do this.

4. Try to stay positive

While it’s not possible to be positive every moment of your life, striving for a positive attitude and good news when you can is always best. What this does for others is it makes them feel better about themselves. It makes them feel like there is hope in the world when they are disappointed. Work on your positive feelings and this will transform the way you and others think.

Becoming a charismatic person

Basically, I believe we should make a decision to move toward building a more charismatic personality. Why? Well, because being a good influence, truly listening and being kind never hurt anyone. In fact, this sort of behavior can change someone’s life for the better, and in huge ways. I encourage you to practice charismatic behavior and learn more about yourself in the process.

How are you improving your self today? Share any ideas if you want.


  1. https://www.success.com
  2. https://psycnet.apa.org

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This Post Has 6 Comments

  1. D

    I met two such personality’s they’re delightful but beyond the projected personality of a charasmatic is a very complicated character, they have an ethereal presence, magical almost and yes I’d say they have a soulful magnetic presence, they’re quite rare and have many many friends, they often don’t realize how bright they are, it’s a pure bright light, sparkly eyed, they are super positive and put on a great show, been do naturally confident, but beyond the natural facade, they are lonely lonely poeple in a world that is not charasmatic. What we need is a charasmatic world, they are beyond a time from past or future. God bless thanks for reading. X

    1. This makes me sad. Of course, I am not that charismatic and I do not have lots of friends, but I am sitting here imagining this bright person. It reminds me of when Dorothy’s world turned color in The Wizard of Oz. I really don’t know why I just thought of that. I also saw this blinding light, too bright for most of us to tolerate, and I think that’s why the light is lonely. There are few bright lights and much darkness on this planet. Most of us are in the dark, or in partial shadows, some may be a little dull, or some blurry, but few are crisp, bright and alluring anymore.

      I wonder if it’s because we’ve lost who we are as individuals. And I wonder if these truly charismatic people, rare as they must be, actually know the full potential of man and woman to be loving, kind and illuminating….but just cannot remember their connection with the others. Not the “many friend” connection, but the agape love connection we are supposed to have. Just thoughts…

  2. jess quigley

    Name a book. I attract lots ofmfollowers but turn off just as many. Im too opionated and have difficulty toerating fools. i reall don’t wwish to hurt anyone and wish to stop being so pompous and help people more.

    1. Interacting with other humans is difficult and someone will always misunderstand you or call you cruel. I was thinking of that old saying, “You can’t make everybody happy all of the time”, or something of that nature, and it’s true. So, don’t try that. Make you happy, strive to be kind, and strive to help when you can. If you think of it too much, you will drive yourself nuts.

      Just work on yourself. Be better and do better….everyday…little by little…until you start to notice.

  3. Dolly's Dad

    I believe the charismatic personality is developed during childhood. It is not something that you can ‘learn’ as a total package. If you have an egotistical personality it shows a past trauma or loss that hasn’t been dealt with in a healthy manner, and no matter how much you try to relearn a new personality type, the original will always shine through.

    1. Dolly,
      Yes, it is hard to become a better person, a more charismatic, or a more selfless person. But most things aren’t impossible. Always remember this. There are sticky traits in my personality as well, but over the years, I have managed to get rid of a few negative things that controlled me….not talking about people, but the things I did to myself. The thing is, you can almost always change if you want to. There are few random evil personalities that I’ve seen that we’re incapable of change.

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