I think I’ve had my fill of fake people. They take so much from you and leave so little. A genuine person, on the other hand, can become a devoted friend.

It’s incredibly hard sometimes to tell the difference between a genuinely nice person and a fake individual. They can showcase similar traits. However, a nice person who is real isn’t showcasing at all. The traits they show are their real characteristics.

How to tell fake from genuine people

Learning how to tell the difference between authentic and fake individuals takes a few life lessons. Unfortunately, many of us must go through relationships with fake people to understand how they operate.

I’ve been with fake people, and when I realized they weren’t genuine, it made me sick to my stomach. Yes, it’s just that deplorable to me.

Now, I will say, we can all have a fake moment here and there, but fake people have a personality disorder. They stay true to the image they’ve made for themselves. Unlike real people, who experience life as it comes and make decisions according to their beliefs and boundaries, fake people imitate human characteristics and emotions.

To delve deeper, let’s look at specific ways to tell the difference between the two.

1. Attention seeking/ contentment.

Fake people never get enough attention, and it’s because they don’t like themselves unless others like them first. Genuine people are content with who they are and need no extra attention to prove their good points.

For instance, fake people may have loads of friends while authentic individuals may have only a few trusted people in their lives. This is because real people don’t need numbers, they just need a few committed loved ones.

2. No respect/plenty of respect

Real people have respect for others. If they realize that someone doesn’t like something, a real person makes sure it doesn’t happen again. With fake people, there is no respect for boundaries at all.

If you tell a fake person that they’ve hurt you, they refuse to acknowledge what they’ve done, often trying to deflect the blame. They don’t respect you, but a real person does. And a real person will go to great lengths to make you feel comfortable in their presence.

3. Liars/honesty

Many fake people practice all sorts of deception. The reasons for this are unclear at times. It seems like after telling so many lies, they would feel burdened and guilty, but most of them do not. They lie as if it’s second nature to them.

You can tell when you’re in the presence of this person because they have a hard time looking you in the face. They know what they’re doing, but for some reason, they think it’s okay.

An honest person, who is also genuine, will be honest even at the expense of hurting your feelings. They will be honest, not because they are afraid of getting caught in a lie, or because they are about to get caught in a lie, but because they cannot stand to carry the burden, and they feel incredibly bad when they lie.

Yes, honest people occasionally lie, and that’s because we’re all human, but they don’t make a habit of this. They make mistakes.

Here’s a simple breakdown:

Fake person=liar

Genuine person=tells a lie sometimes

There is a difference.

4. Brag/humble

Real people are humble, or they try to be as much as possible. Even when they feel as though they’re telling too much about their accomplishments, they back up and say,

“Sorry, I’m bragging, I guess”.

But with fake people, they brag all the time. For instance, they say things like,

“Look at the new car I bought!”

and then the next day,

“See how I cleaned up the house?”

You see, bragging is seeking approval, and with real people, they don’t feel as though they need approval from anyone.

5. Copy/ go their own way

Fake people survive off copying the things that others do. They even copy beliefs and standards even when they’re unhealthy ways of living. They take these pieces of others and stitch them together as their own personality. It kind of reminds me of a mental Frankenstein monster.

On the other hand, real people find their own paths in life and dig deep within to understand and appreciate their own talents, likes, and dislikes that have nothing to do with anyone else. It’s astonishingly different behavior.

6. Fake emotions/real emotions

To be in the presence of a fake person can be creepy. They may cry if they lose a close loved one, but these tears are few and far between. They can show happiness well because this means they’ve gotten something they want and they can show anger, but when they do it looks like a child throwing a tantrum, and it’s usually used as intimidation to get their way.

As far as feeling bad for the wrongs they do, they cannot seem to cry or feel remorse like normal people. As I said, it’s cringy and almost unbelievable to witness.

Genuine people cry, they laugh, they love, and when they do this, it means something deep. They are empathetic and aren’t afraid to show their emotions. When they get angry, it looks like anger and not some plastic version of a fake person’s tantrum. When a real person cries, they are hurting, and the hurt is just as real as they are.

How to deal with fake people

Although we don’t want to, we sometimes must deal with inauthentic people, especially in the workplace. When we do, it’s best to give them limited information about ourselves and keep our distance as much as possible.

Even though we’d love to help them become authentic people, it’s sometimes impossible. Unfortunately, fake people have been this way all their lives, for the most part, and changing is up to them. If you know someone like this, I feel for you. I do too.

So, I send blessings for any negative experiences you’ve been through. Stay well.

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This Post Has 6 Comments

  1. Daffodil

    Well done, Sherrie. Once again, you’ve hit the nail on the head. I would add that fake people tend to intentionally draw vulnerable people into their web. They tend to take dominate every situation as if they are the experts. If anything threatens their superiority, they instantly become vipers and will strike with poisonous fangs.

    1. Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

      Yes, it’s a common thing. Fake people are frightened of who they really are or they dislike their imperfections so much that they replace them with a facade. It’s a defense mechanism to strikeout. If they can draw more negative attention to you, or make you feel guilty, they remove the negative attention from themselves. Their dominance means they’re in control of how they are perceived.

  2. Lindsay

    Hey Sherrie, sounds a bit vilifying when some of these traits could come from a place of insecurity and not inherently evil like the picture being painted.

    1. Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

      You’re right, and this is true. I watch quite a few true crime documentaries and even the most heinous crimes have sad origins. So, when I consider people being fake, I consider there is a reason for that. They aren’t devils. Many people are insecure in extremes, and they try to fit in by using fake aspects not belonging to their personalities. However, when this is happening, other people can suffer from the characters they’ve created. Being understanding helps to a point, but if someone is not willing to eventually find their true self, there’s not a lot of YOU left to sacrifice to the consequences of their costumes. There is a point I’m trying to make, but it’s difficult to put into words. No, fake people are not villains, but You cannot cater to them forever, even with fake niceness. These actions come from deep places, and sometimes we have to love them from a distance.

  3. mustafa

    this what i used to be believe in my life once one have the best of given bestowed by nature there is unneeded of seeking approval from any person

  4. Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

    That is right, Mustafa

    The approval comes from within, ultimately. We are born alone and we will die that way too.

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