Did you know we spend a third of our lives at work? That equates to 90,000 hours in a lifetime, which is a colossal amount of time, even if you enjoy your job, but one study found that 36% of workers reported dealing with conflict often, very often or all the time.
Toxic coworkers include bullies, slackers, blame shifters; I could continue. Here’s how to deal with toxic coworkers.
The Bully: Uses aggression and intimidation to get their own way
Bullies are common in the workplace and have a devastating effect on their coworker’s mental health. They can be verbally and physically abusive and often target people who are weaker or different.
How to deal with bullies:
Keep a record of all incidents of bullying behavior, making sure you include dates, times and witnesses if you can. Save evidence such as aggressive emails and record verbal abuse. Once you have enough evidence, approach your manager or HR.
The Slacker: Puts in minimal effort, which increases the workload for others
Slackers are workers who look busy but achieve little. They always show up late, leave early, and expect others to do their work.
How to deal with slackers:
If you are their coworker, ask them what tasks they have that day. Get them to clarify their responsibilities so it’s obvious when they slack off, and if they continue slacking, take your concerns to the manager or HR.
The Blame Shifter: Points fingers at others when things go wrong
The blame shifter never takes responsibility for their mistakes and is quick to throw others under the bus to escape accountability. This stifles productivity as workers are more concerned about staying out of trouble than being productive.
How to deal with blamer shifters:
Go through every step of the situation to clarify everyone’s actions.
The Saboteur: Intentionally sabotages projects to undermine coworkers
Saboteurs are a strange bunch. Their sole intention is to make others look incompetent. They’ll withhold information, spread false information, disrupt workflow and blame others when things go wrong. All because they feel threatened by you.
How to deal with saboteurs:
Gather evidence that supports your concerns. This includes emails, reports, witness statements and any suspicious activity, then take your evidence to your manager.
The Knowledge Hoarder: Refuses to share vital information
Knowledge hoarders keep critical information to themselves. This hinders productivity and creates a dependency on one person. Knowledge hoarders see value in information and fear losing this value if they give it up.
How to deal with knowledge hoarders:
If you want to know how to deal with toxic coworkers like knowledge hoarders, it’s simple; be the opposite of them. Openly share your information and show there’s more value in giving than hoarding. If their behavior doesn’t change, be selective about what you share.
The Boundary Crosser: Repeated contact out of work hours, overly personal
There are two types of boundary crosser, ones that don’t see any difference between work and leisure time, and others that try to inveigle their way into your personal life.
How to deal with boundary crossers:
Set limits to your interactions, for example, reply once to late night texts with, “Please contact me during work hours.” Don’t engage in sharing personal information. If they persist in TMI conversations, politely say, “I’m on a deadline, and I need to focus on work.”
The Gossip: Spreads rumors, causing division and unrest
Gossips never share positive things about their coworkers. It’s always negative or derogatory. It causes suspicion and a tense atmosphere.
How to deal with gossips:
Shut down gossip instantly by saying, “I can’t believe that happened. Do you mind if we talk to the other person?” Or, “I never talk about people who aren’t here to defend themselves.”
The Kiss-up/Kick-downer: Climbs the career ladder any way possible.
Kiss-up/kick-downers progress their careers by sucking up to the bosses and trampling over anyone in their way. They make themselves indispensable to management and belittle their worker peers, sabotaging their chances for success.
How to deal with kiss-up/kick-downers:
Talk to your coworkers and see if they have the same problem. The more of you who know the situation, the easier it will be to deal with it. Be mindful when talking to management. These types of toxic workers have charmed their way into the bosses’ good books, and you might come across as jealous. If you talk to your boss, keep it factual, not emotional.
The Favor Asker: Keeps asking for a ‘quick favor’; you end up doing all the work
This person keeps asking you for a favor, which turns out to be a full-blown project and ends up with you doing all the work.
How to deal with the favor asker:
Tell them you are available to help them this time, but be sure to say in future you are busy and need to concentrate on your own work.
The Know-it-all: Won’t consider any idea that’s not their own
Know-it-alls are a real pain in the workplace. They don’t like suggestions and force their ideas onto everyone because they think they’re right.
How to deal with know-it-alls:
Encourage information sharing. Make sure you let your coworkers know you value their contributions. Don’t let one person monopolize meetings. Focus on teamwork and the goal of the project.
The Liar: Lies about everything
This toxic coworker will lie to cover up their mistakes, to shift the blame, to get out of situations and to cover their backs. It causes tension among colleagues, especially if the manager hasn’t picked up on the lying.
How to deal with liars:
Collect evidence and confront the liar or present your findings to your manager. Be matter of fact, not emotional.
The Complainer: Constant negativity brings everyone down
Complainers find fault with everything; they highlight all the problems but never offer a solution. Their constant complaining makes their coworkers despondent and stifles the working environment.
How to deal with complainers:
Complainers like to criticize solutions offered by their coworkers. One way to get them to engage is to ask them, “How would you solve this problem?” Encourage them to join in rather than complain.
The Micromanager: Manages everything, never delegates
Micromanagers are control freaks who cannot allow others to play a role. They might give you menial tasks to keep you busy or set unreasonable deadlines you cannot achieve.
How to deal with micromanagers:
Knowing how to deal with toxic coworkers like micromanagers isn’t easy, but you must persevere. Here’s how to deal with a toxic coworker who micromanages; talking about the end goal, rather than the minutiae of the project, gets them to divert focus away from the small stuff. Tell them,
“This is how I’m tackling this project; if you foresee any problems, let me know.”
The Credit Stealer: Takes credit for your work
Credit stealers jump in at the last moment to take credit for your work. They befriend you to steal all your ideas.
How to deal with credit stealers:
Keep an evidence trail of every step in your work. Send updates to managers giving progress reports. This will document your contribution. Be mindful of when the credit stealer nicks your work (meetings, project updates, informal chats with management) and be ready to confront them.
We can’t control the actions of others, but we can control how we respond to them. However, if your toxic workplace is affecting your mental health, you must get help from a third party. Remember, you are not alone; others are in the same situation as you, and it won’t last forever.
I believe karma sorts these people out in the future. I hope that if you’re in a toxic workplace, you’ve found the above suggestions of how to deal with toxic coworkers useful. In the meantime, I’ve read two pieces of advice I think are helpful:
‘Work is a stage. You are an actor. Now go be the best actor you can be.’
‘Clock-in… Zone-out. I will speak about work-related topics and avoid anything about my personal life.’
View Comments
Another toxicity is when someone asks a question, but your explanations never satisfy them. You try the best, but the other party repeats the question. It seems to me that they ask the questions not because they want to understand but to control you. When you manage to break the loop, they report it to the manager. Why? Because the management encourage one to ask questions if they do not understand, and you are supposed to answer patiently.
Breaking the loop is something you should celebrate.