Do you hate your life? Well, to be honest, there have been times where I wasn’t really happy with mine either.
I can see why some people may hate the life that was given to them. That’s because I’ve seen poverty and I’ve seen what horrific pain can do to a person. Many times, I hate my life and that’s generally due to my anxiety and depression. It really has so much to do with why I felt this way. Many teens suffer from this mentality. Even my own son admitted he’d thought about suicide a few times.
So, let’s examine this hatred for life.
Why Do I Hate My Life?
Guess what, the basic origin of the hatred of life comes from your childhood. Surprise! Yet again, here’s another dysfunctional attitude that came from a bunch of crappy experiences as a child. I really wish children everywhere could experience a healthy childhood and think a bit better of life… even later on as an adult.
Well, while your childhood may have been the origin, as an adult, there are many other reasons why we keep feeling this way. Let’s take a look.
1. We feel like failures
It could be that the plans we had for ourselves didn’t work out so well. Maybe we married and figured there would be a happy-ever-after experience, but then we divorced. Ugggh, I really hate that one. I’ve been divorced twice, and yes, I do sometimes feel like I’ve failed.
You could have lost a job, a job you loved at that. This will also make you feel like a failure. You might just start hating your life altogether.
What can you do?
So what, you got a divorce, maybe two, or even three. This doesn’t mean you are a failure in the long run. It just means you picked the wrong one. Just because you lost your job, and a job you love, doesn’t mean life is over. Fate could be pushing you in the direction of a better job.
In all areas of life where you feel you’ve failed, I am sure there’s something better around the corner. Just keep hope alive, and your self-esteem up. Remember that even the most successful people have failed, but they had the mental toughness to keep trying.
2. You listen to lies
If you’re a highly impressionable person, you may act according to what others think or say about you. If your friends or family members are constantly criticizing you for things, this will start to weigh you down. I don’t understand why friends do this, but they do. After a while of listening to the lies they tell you, and many of them are lies, by the way, you will begin to feel like life just sucks.
What can you do?
I say get better friends. Who needs friends that constantly criticize them. You need friends who are going to build you up. If one of these friends, however, is really important to you, then just learn that her criticism is only negativity and she could be deflecting the feelings about herself onto you. Just get smart and do some inventory of your friends. Sometimes, cutting ties to the wrong people helps you take control of your life.
3. You’re alone
Whether it’s because you never married, or your family moved away, it’s not easy being alone sometimes. There are several circumstances that create a scenario where we end up all alone feeling stuck in a rut.
My aunt, she never married, never had children and lived, at least an hour from the rest of her family. She was sometimes lonely, but she managed to live life to the fullest. I am sure, in her private hours, she cried a bit about being lonely, and it’s hard to feel happy and enjoy life when you crave company.
What can you do?
If you’re alone, for whatever reason, it’s always best to get involved in a hobby, spend time outside, or even make new friends. Here’s one that many of my friends do, they rent a large home, and rent out rooms for roommates. There’s never a dull moment there.
If you’re lonely and hating life right now, get out of your house and help someone, do something, or go somewhere exciting. You might not want to at first, but after you are out, you will feel a bit better about life. Who knows, you may find your purpose or the people who will change your whole existence in the process. All it takes is to dare and try to live a more active and fulfilling life.
4. You’re broke, you have no money
It’s easy to hate life when you’re broke sometimes, especially when you see everybody else going out to eat and going to festivals. I remember many times feeling as though I hated life for being dealt with specific cards. I was having babies and didn’t have a dime to spare. Also, I was in a bad relationship and my partner was spending all the money on negative things.
Sometimes, however, you can break just trying to start your life, and that’s still kind of a letdown. It’s a tough situation.
What can you do?
Well, for one, I got out of that relationship and got my own job. I started learning to live on my own and manage my money. Soon enough, I had a little bit of money to splurge. When I didn’t, I and my children made up games to play, went on nature walks, and just watched movies together. I promise you, it’s not necessary to have a lot of money and be happy. I’ve been there, done that.
5. You have a mental illness
Here’s the one that’s truly the hardest to beat. I do have a mental illness, said it many times, and I am not ashamed. And I have attempted suicide twice in the past and think about it almost every day. I’m not making any plans though, so don’t be alarmed. My mental illness is the reason why I hate my life sometimes.
Having a mental illness can make you despise life. It’s not that you don’t like yourself… There is not always a reason like some particular negative thoughts about yourself or your life. Sometimes, it’s just because you’re tired of feeling. It’s that simple.
What can you do?
Well, if you believe in medicating your symptoms, then do so, but only prescriptions from your physician, that is. Substance abuse can make your negative thoughts and feelings much worse than they are. My medications do help lighten the load of overbearing darkness and despair.
Get outside! I couldn’t stress this enough! Nature is so good for those with mental illnesses. Keep a positive support system. This means friends and family members that say good things to and about you, not negative. When you think about harming yourself, tell someone, even if it has to be every day.
We are brothers and sisters in this great big world, we should care for each other. If you are dealing with persistent suicidal thoughts, seek professional help. Consider seeing a psychotherapist or browse support groups in your area.
The Good News Is That You Can Stop Hating Your Life
Yes, sometimes, I hate my life. But I try to remember that life has many beautiful things if you know where to look. They are usually small things, things that make us see from a whole new perspective.
So, I encourage you, that if you hate your life, get outside your comfort zone and experience something new. You might be surprised by how fast your change you view on this life, the only one you have.
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This Post Has 4 Comments
i feel a bit of relief hearing the author say they think about suicide every day”..so do i for most of my life. 67 yrs old. spent lifetime trying to heal and understand my torment from developmental ptsd. often hate my life but really know it’s intense shame and never goes away. rational mind doesn’t have much effect on it. i make progress over the years, but each day is a struggle. interactions with people almost always have triggers. lessens the bad feelings i have about myself to know someone else has similar struggles.
I also find relief hearing you say that reactions with people cause triggers. My husband still doesn’t understand this. My life has been so difficult in the past that almost everything triggers something in me. I can smell whiskey and get scared because my ex-husband was an alcoholic. I can see pretty girls giggling and I get angry at them because I was cheated on so many times with giggly girls. Loud noises scare me and I have panic attacks. When I say I want to kill myself, it’s not because I want to die. I don’t want to die. I just want all this unhappiness to go away…but it doesn’t. It gets tolerable for a few days and then something destroys my peace again.
My happiness, what I have of it, comes from simple things like my dog, my cats, going outside and enjoying the weather, watching classic sitcoms, reading good books and playing some games. I don’t like being around people all that much, and it takes a long time for me to get used to a person in real life. I’m glad you wrote, and I’m glad you guys understand.
Dearest Sherrie!! If you only knew how much I can relate. Indeed, the catalyst to most of these feelings of despair is the inevitable, crappy childhood. It almost always is. And it can take decades to conquer the malevolence that comes along with it…and who can say that we ever will? Although, I can find comfort in knowing that good people, like you, are here going through similar hardships. I do hate that these horrible things exist and that they damage the best of our Souls’, but energy can be renewed…and that’s the beauty of Life. Thank you once again for your articles. Sending much Love your way <3
I always love it when I meet someone who understands the struggle. There are so many people that have no idea how hard it is to truly love the life you have. I’m not purposely trying to take anything for granted, it’s just darkness falls over everything, at times, and life just seems hopeless. I keep going, however, for many reasons. I wrote an article the other day about the reasons why we should keep living, and I saw that I had three different reasons already. One of those reasons was that if I left this world today, I might miss something amazing tomorrow. I try to keep this in mind when I think my life sucks. Sending love your way as well.