For many people, so-called little white lies are seen as permissible. It has to do with the fact that those who tell them think they are doing so with good reasons.
Lies are more prevalent in our daily lives than they have ever been. However, in some people’s minds at the very least, not all lies are the same. Deliberately lying in a hurtful or deceitful way to cause harm or cover over a transgression is seen as bad by most people. Still, some other kinds of lies, including white lies, are not. These little white lies aim to avoid unnecessarily hurting a friend, relative or partner. It can also happen simply because you feel the truth is just not important.
However, the truth about lies is that they are colour blind. So placing the words white and little before a lie doesn’t make it any less bad than other types.
Why though? There are a number of good reasons why white lies are more damaging than you think. Today, we are going to highlight some in the following article.
1. If Someone Can Lie About Small Stuff, It Is Likely They Will Lie about Bigger Stuff
As is the case with many things in life and the world, they start small but grow and expand. Lies are no different. What begins as telling a little white lie and feeling awkward about it, develops. You tell another one and another one – with each one, it starts to get easier and easier. Eventually, you are telling progressively bigger lies without even batting an eyelid about it.
2. Lies Equates to Dishonesty Regardless of the Size
For most people, their reputation is important. Dishonesty is not good for your reputation. For instance, in business, people will choose to buy products or use your services based on what you tell them. If you are caught in even a small lie, it can cause hard-to-rectify issues.
Even if you tell your wife or friend that their really bad idea is ‘OK’, just because you don’t want to be negative, you are still not being honest with them. Honesty is important to your reputation and also relationships, whether they are personal or business ones.
3. White Lies, Even the Really Small Ones Can Cause Others to Look Foolish
Often, as we noted at the outset, people tell white lies because they want to avoid hurting someone they care about and love. Often though, this actually backfires.
For instance, you avoid being honest about someone in your life’s singing ability and they book an open mic spot or perform in front of the general public. What’s the result? You could be setting that person you care about for humiliation. Because they are not a good singer and people who are not emotionally invested in them aren’t going to spare their feelings.
It is much better to use tact and be honest with them, than pretending that they sing like an angel just to spare their feelings.
4. White Lies Distort Reality
Even when you tell one little white lie, that doesn’t seem like a big problem, it eventually develops. For instance, you tell a little fib that you can’t help a friend out because of back issues. At the same time, you know full well you don’t have back problems. Once you have told that lie, unless you want to fess up and explain you were just making an excuse, you will start to expound on the lie.
This creates a distorted reality. Unless you want to be honest completely with that friend (or in other situations and examples), you have to continue with it.
Simply put, lies aren’t truthful. So when you tell little white lies in life, your life becomes less and less honest.
5. Little White Lies, Like All Lies, Eventually Catch You Out
When you are building a world of dishonesty, even from little white lies here and there – they will eventually catch up with you or you will be caught out. It doesn’t matter how good you think you are, most liars are eventually discovered to be what they are.
So it is better to be honest as much as you can and avoid getting yourself tangled in these webs of little half-truths and white lies that so many people think are okay.
Hopefully, the above article has shown just how damaging so-called little white lies can be to your life and relationships. It might take a lot more guts and strength of character to be honest. But your friends, relatives and other people in your life while undoubtedly appreciate it and come to respect you more for it.
The alternative is that you continue telling little white lies and lead a life that is more and more distorted. In the end, you will find yourself believing the things that are not true to be the reality.
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This Post Has One Comment
Valerie, I hope this comment reaches you. I believe there are lies of omission and lies of commission. We lie to avoid the uncomfortable feeling that telling the truth often causes. It is difficult to make it through one 24 period without telling a lie because telling the truth often leads to a confrontation. Also we do need to be sure we have our facts straight before we respond to someone because, if we don’t, we may end up with egg on our face! Our ego is usually what gets in the way of telling the truth and ego can be our worst enemy. I can often spot a lie by noting a persons body language and looking directly into their eyes. Tough issue to resolve even though the solution is right before us.