Living in fear doesn’t always mean that you’re scared of physical circumstances or people. Sometimes living in fear can be a state of mind that controls all aspects of life.

I am afraid almost all of the time. Because of that small percentage of courage that I do have, it means that I am trying to get better.

For most of my life, I’ve been living in fear of something. Whether it’s the weather, what my friends think, or the safety of my children, I have usually been terrified of some particular circumstance. Do you live in fear?

Understanding what you feel

If you’re living in fear, you might not even know it yet. It’s not always easy to recognize the symptoms of this negative trait. Living in fear can manifest in your health as well, making you sick or crippling your immune system temporarily.

There are certain signs that prove you’re living in fear and certain ways to help eliminate the majority of these fears.

1. You are a perfectionist

If you strive to make sure that everything is perfect, then you might be living in fear. It’s scary to think about rejection or not being good enough, and if these thoughts rule your head, then so will fear.

It’s good to try as hard as possible to do good deeds, but it’s unhealthy to be a perfectionist. Your life will be controlled by what you cannot do and how you might fail. Another reason why being a perfectionist means you are afraid is because you think that no one else can do things as good as you.

 2. Not taking risks

Living in fear means you won’t take as many risks either. Where some people will do courageous things, you might feel more comfortable playing it safe. This can be a personal preference, and yet, it can be a sign of cowardice.

Life doesn’t have to be a thrill ride, but every once in a while, it’s normal to take a chance. Fear will not let this happen.

3. Procrastination

You have priorities. These can be easy tasks or much harder ones. If you love to procrastinate most of the time, you could be lazy. Then again, you could also be living in fear.

Some of these things you need to do will take courage, and you know this. Hence, the reason you put it off for another day. The truth is, it’s best to get it done and move on. This is easier said than done, however.

4. You are controlling as well

People who latch onto control are usually the scared ones. The ability to keep your life the same, day in and day out, is something many people covet. Unfortunately, life changes whether you like it or not.

Controlling people hold tighter the more things change. Living in fear is a common characteristic of controlling individuals because it’s hard to keep things the way you want all of the time. Losing control is terrifying.

5. Inability to speak up

It’s not just about speech class. It’s about speaking your opinion when you feel the need. Stifling this basic liberty is a form of control. When you do it to yourself, its fear.

If you cannot seem to say what you feel, then you are living in fear of something. Anyone should feel safe enough to speak truths from their own beliefs. Living in fear can also be the root of shyness.

6. Sickness

Of course, sickness is caused by a multitude of illnesses. Having symptoms of physical sickness can also come from feelings of fear.

Have you ever felt butterflies in your stomach? Why sure you have. Well, these butterflies don’t only come around when you fall in love, they also come around when you are faced with something frightening.

If fear rules your life, these small symptoms can turn into permanent illness caused by a psychological issue from the past – they come in a form of fear.

How do you fix fear?

It’s not always an easy task to heal the feelings of fear. This is because fear usually comes from something in the past that has caused psychological damage. It’s also not smart to think of fear as something that has to be cured at all.

Some fear is good and it can be used to warn us about dangerous threats to our lives. On the other hand, living with fear can be crippling. Here are ways to deal with fear and make living a lot easier.

  • Meditation

Meditation is a friend of faith. It teaches us to be present in the here and now. This focus teaches us to differentiate between making change and fate.

Inside enlightened states, there is no fear. There is nothing but our being and our connection with the world. Meditation clears our minds so we can understand what’s most important.

  • Support

It’s important to have friends who can be supportive of your journey to rid yourself of unhealthy fears. You should avoid those who think negatively and use fear to form their lives.

Instead, you should bond with those who are living their lives with minimum fear instead. They can be your influence and give you strength to go on.

  • Stop being angry

To stop living in fear, you must stop being angry at everyone and everything. You have to stop seeing life and the universe as your enemy. The universe is not against you and your mind has created many dangerous assumptions to the contrary. A solution comes when you learn to love instead of hate.

Let’s change our lives together!

Now that you can see the truth of your fear, let’s find a way to deal with it in a healthy manner. Like I said, healthy fear is okay, but letting it rule your life is far from the solution.

Stop trying to control everything and just live. A little bit of freedom and courage will surprise you with happiness!

You can be at peace, no longer living in fear.



Copyright © 2012-2024 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.

power of misfits book banner desktop

Like what you are reading? Subscribe to our newsletter to make sure you don’t miss new thought-provoking articles!

This Post Has 7 Comments

  1. Gary Hynous

    Good advice, Sherrei. I’ve been trained to live in the moment. The past is over so why have regrets? The future is a mystery which we can control, to a certain extent, only by making wise choices. Don’t regret your past mistakes, learn from them. Many years ago a book was written titled ‘Be Here Now”. All we have is our life unfolding before us moment by moment. Choose wisely and things will most likely be fine.

    1. Sherrie

      I agree, Gary. I struggle in this area, I must admit, but I do believe that many of us can do with a little “here and now” for a change. Even though I am one of those people who fear change, stepping out into new things kind of helps some with their anxieties. Although, you must help people live in the present moment, bit by bit. Too much change all at once can scare them back into hiding. lol I know, it’s happened to me. Thank you for the encouragement.

  2. Ahsen

    I’m definitely one of those people who secretly lives in fear. I always try to push myself to do things like ,whatever and fail. Also whenever some unexpected change occurs in my life, it makes me so anxious and vulnerable and effects me physically. But ım fighting it and try to motivate myself to come out of my shell. Also thanks for the article

    1. Sherrie

      I struggle with this every day. It’s a huge step for me to step out and face my fears. Me thinks I should practice more things outside my comfort zone, huh..

  3. star

    what if your parents are controlling? then

  4. Kirsten

    I have to say for years I’ve been struggling with anxiety/depression and never knew the root of my problem. Now because of this article and the perspective it gave me, I can move on and resolve my emotions correctly. Thank you to everyone who put work into this article and for helping me start my mental health journey!

Leave a Reply