Mixed feelings can be extremely hard to figure out, especially when you’re upset. The key is getting to the core of your emotions.

I have mixed feelings all the time, especially lately. It’s primarily because of the things I’ve discovered in my life that aren’t beneficial to me but are still part of my day to day life. Sometimes, it’s incredibly difficult to cut away at feelings to get to the root of what’s going on. That’s why identifying your emotions first is the answer.

How to properly sort out mixed feelings

Like the primary colors red, blue, and yellow, there are primary emotions that every human being uses. These primary emotions are usually obvious to others. Then you have secondary emotions, which are akin to green, purple, and orange and these emotions are a bit more complicated. They, like colors, are the product of mixed feelings. So first off, let’s get down to the basics.

Identifying the emotions

1. Happiness

This emotion is also called joy and is a pure feeling of elation that everyone chases after at one point or the other in their lives. Sometimes happiness comes easy, and sometimes you have to fight for it. One thing is for sure, it’s a pure and simple feeling.

2. Anger

When you are unhappy with someone or something, you may feel angry. This anger isn’t quite as simple as happiness, although it has been considered a primary emotion for a long time. There is always a reason why someone is angry. They have either been hurt or feel physically or mentally threatened in order to get this feeling.

3. Fear

The emotion of fear comes from basically not knowing the outcome of a situation, especially if it’s bound to be a bad one. Certain signs can fuel fear making it worse as well. To be honest, fear relies heavily on the future,  totally disregarding the present.

4. Surprise

This emotion comes from an adrenaline rush paired with the fact of being presented with something you didn’t know but in a sudden way. Some people appreciate surprises while others don’t care too much for them. It all depends on the personality and preference of each person.

5. Disgust

The emotion of disgust comes from a powerful aversion to a person, place or thing. This emotion comes from your personal preferences to actions or surroundings, even in complicated situations. However, disgust is still a primary emotion.

6. Sadness

I think sadness speaks volumes on its own. Sadness comes from the loss of something or someone. It can be death to divorce or even the loss of a job. Sadness can come when friends move away or even more reasons. There are so many reasons why you can become saddened. Some call this emotional distress because, in that moment of sadness, you feel the most vulnerable.

Sorting a few mixed feelings

Now that you’re familiar with the primary emotions, let’s delve a little deeper. Since these primary emotions occur every day, we start to get a conflict of feelings according to these emotions. This is when complex emotions start to surface. These complex emotions are basically mixed feelings.

Take your closest relationship, for instance, you’re not always happy or angry at this person. Sometimes you can’t really figure out what you’re feeling about them. Feelings like guilt or shame, which of course are complex emotions, derive from two or more primary emotions. Guilt, for instance, could come from a mixture of anger and disgust toward yourself. The same can be said for shame.

Pride, is a strange feeling, but I honestly believe it comes from a mixture of happiness and fear. There is, however, a good form of pride that resides pretty much within the confines of happiness, but when there is too much pride, it means you fear others advancing ahead of you. Thus, you “Puff up” with too much of the praise for yourself.

When you’re confused

Mixed feelings aren’t even as simple as those I talked about above. There comes a time when we’re trapped in an impasse. There are reasons to say yes, and there are reasons to say no. There are reasons to leave and there are reasons to go. Whatever the circumstance, your mixed feelings can be two-fold or three, and they can cause mental and physical stress.

This is why sorting out your basic emotions helps to make decisions and come to important conclusions. You will never reach an answer until you do. You see, the problem with mixed feelings is there will usually be an even amount of pulling in one way or the other, and it will take basically making most decisions completely on your own.

The worst thing to do with mixed feelings is to add another person’s feelings to the mix. I’ve had to learn that the hard way.

Are you ready to get things sorted out?

Now that I’ve broken down a few emotions for you, it’s time to tackle those mixed feelings. Will you or won’t you? The hard truth that life has provided reminds us that no one can decide our life path but ourselves. So, I wish you all the luck in finding the truth behind your mixture of complex emotions.


  1. https://plato.stanford.edu
  2. https://scholar.harvard.edu

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