Your values in life are a sort of compass that guides you when it comes to making important decisions. How do you know if you need to reconsider yours?
Why do people have wrong values in life? This is a question asked by many but answered by very few. The reasons are not common for everyone and depend on the individual, but low values in life can only leave a negative impact and destroy our chances of success.
Unfortunately, each of us experiences a certain period where our values need some serious reconsideration. After all, values are what gives clarity in life and allows us to make the toughest of decisions. If you pick the wrong values, you won’t have the right guide to help you through challenging times.
When we aren’t clear about our values in life, we cannot look into some general guide and fix the problem. They are unique to every person and based on their own beliefs and experiences.
They will depend on the life of the person, whether they are introvert or extrovert, and the choices they make regarding their values.
Fortunately, several certain red flags can show you whether changes are essential for your happiness, such as:
A person with low values is often dissatisfied with things in their life. They constantly struggle with the outcome of their life decisions but still cannot take responsibility for what happened. This is the first sign that you should reconsider your values.
In order to grow and learn in life, we need to understand the importance of our choices. Mistakes aren’t something to feel sorry for, and they can often serve as the best guide towards the right idea.
A person who is overly self-critical experiences low values in life. When this happens, learning from mistakes is not possible since the focus is then placed on the criticism instead of the learning.
3. Hero Complex
This is one of the many psychological complexes that trouble our minds. If experienced often, this can be a red flag pointing out to the necessity to change your priorities in life.
Did you know that the most common group of people who have the hero complex is firefighters? When a person is doing a dangerous job, they often develop the need to be the center of attention, and, therefore, enjoy the opportunities to rescue someone for the wrong reason.
This does not sound so bad since the job of the firefighters is to save people. However, if a person suffers from the need to help others at any cost, it can be dangerous. The hero complex can make a person create or praise situations where they will save another person.
If you think you have the hero complex, you need to change your values in life immediately.
This is closely related to self-criticism, and in most cases, a person that has low values experiences both. When you are self-critical, you are very unlikely to accept criticism and learn from it. Even the most attentive and caring advice will sound like a personal attack, which means that you are hypersensitive to criticism.
A person with low values will have the hardest time making a decision, even for the simplest things in life. They are afraid of the outcome or simply cannot decide on the best solution because they think they will make a mistake.
If you often ask others for the answer, you are an indecisive person. This means that you fear responsibility and cannot step up and make the key decisions for your life. When this is the case, you need to reconsider your values.
How do you see your future? If the answer is negative, you need to set your values straight. The glass is not half-empty, but it is half-full instead. Having a positive outlook on the future is the key to success in life.
In addition to the negative outlook for the near and far future, a person with low values in life does not believe in their strengths and abilities. The fear of being unable to overcome an obstacle prevents them from taking the step, even if they are more than skilled to finish the task.
Do you believe your life is not fair? If you do, start reconsidering your values.
Low values give a sense of imperfection, which is why people who have the wrong values in life tend to be perfectionists. They spend an unnecessary amount of time doing tasks that do not need that much attention at all only because they want to go through every detail to make sure they did them right.
Doing things right will not make you feel more adequate. You should stop micromanaging tasks in order to delegate them to others. If you learn not to be so controlling and change your life values, you can get rid of that unhealthy perfectionism.
Low values in life go both ways – you can either be a perfectionist and focus on every little detail, or you may make rash decisions without thinking your actions through.
The first results in overwhelming feeling and stress, while the latter can cause you a lot of disappointment. Interestingly, they are both clear signs you need to set your priorities straight.
The final sign is the most common of them all – boredom. If you are bored at all times and do not find your social life to be satisfying, you need to make some changes in life. Your time spent with friends and acquaintances should be the time to look forward to, not dread.
If you feel this way, it might be time to reconsider your circle of friends. We don’t say that you have to get rid of them altogether, but try to add someone new to your life. Such people can bring new perspectives and make your boredom go away.
Are you experiencing any of these conditions in your life? If the answer is yes, you need to start working on your priorities and set values that will improve your life and well-being. These tips should point out to the discrepancies in your values and tell you whether your life needs changes.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Julie Petersen got a Bachelor’s Degree in Arts at Stanford University in 2010 and since then started her English language teacher and freelance writing career. She was teaching writing classes at Stanford University for 4 years and was practicing private tutoring at the same time.
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