Some Myers-Briggs personalities are so rare they deserve closer scrutiny. The INTJ female is one such example.
Making up just under 1% of the world’s population, notable INTJ females include Jane Austen, Susan Sontag, Lise Meitner, and Emily Jane Brontë, to name just a few. So what are the traits of the fascinating INTJ personality?
INTJ stands for Introverted, Intuition, Thinker, and Judgment.
Female INTJs are private individuals who do not act like ‘girly’ girls. They are not interested in being feminine. They don’t care if men notice them for their looks. Instead, they focus on competence and knowledge.
For INTJ women, knowledge is power. They use logic and reasoning over emotions and other people’s feelings. So long as the job is done and done well, it doesn’t bother them if they upset a few people along the way.
They will stand up to authority if they believe authority is wrong. They instinctively know the right way to do things and can get impatient when others need explanations.
INTJ females don’t need validation from other people to raise their self-esteem or confidence. They have an inbuilt sense of self from years of gathering knowledge and gaining qualifications. So it is this that forms her core being and INTJ personality. Not platitudes from friends or lovers.
However, she does enjoy being noticed for her intelligence and will quietly notch up wins in her mental notebook. If she is studying with others, she’ll have to get the best grades. Not to show off, but to prove to herself that she is the best.
A woman with the INTJ personality will have a few close friends that she’s known for years, decades probably. These friends know to give her space, and not to take offence at her dry comments. They know not to turn up uninvited and that the best gift to buy for her is a book on whatever she’s currently studying or interested in.
INTJ females are natural leaders, but not in an alpha-male kind of way. They steer from the back of the room, quietly but purposefully, guiding others to the same conclusions as theirs.
These women don’t care about the court of public opinion. In fact, they’re quite happy sticking their neck out in opposition to the view of the crowd, if they know they’re right. And, they always know they’re right.
The typical INTJ female is a confident and independent woman who doesn’t need a partner to make her whole. She’s perfectly happy to be on her own. Actually, she’d rather be alone than in a restricting relationship.
Growing up, the INTJ teenager will rebel against what she considers to be unfair and unjust. She’s used to being separate, an outsider if you will. In fact, she has known from an early age she is different.
You can easily spot an INTJ girl at school. When all the other pupils are working on their chosen projects of dogs, cats, or football, she’s engrossed in her electricity project.
But scratch the surface and there’s a wonderful depth to her understanding. If an INTJ woman folds you into her inner circle, it’s likely you’ll never leave or need another friend again. However, you have to break through her tough, self-constructed barrier first. After all, it’s there to protect her fragile heart. Because once this woman falls in love, it’s forever.
So she sets herculean tests to potential suitors. Pass these tests and you will be allowed entry into her sacred inner circle. Those that fail were never her type in the first place.
The INTJ female is a fascinating character. A contradiction, a paradox, a puzzle to be solved if you will. She’s set herself up this way to dispense with those timewasters. She’s full of quirks, qualities, and intriguing traits. But that’s not to say she doesn’t have her own personal struggles in life.
I’ve already established that this female doesn’t do well with authority. Especially if she sees incompetence or a better way to do things. A woman with the INTJ personality type is not afraid of calling out the top bosses for their faults. But she won’t understand why this does her no favours with fellow workers.
I mean, doesn’t everyone want the best solution to a problem? Does it matter who comes up with the idea so long as it works? This woman has no guile. She won’t play party politics and although she may get the result she wanted, she’ll be hurt by her colleague’s reactions to her.
The other problem a female INTJ will face is that because of her standoffish nature, people will think she is a snob. Her co-workers may think that she looks down on them. When in fact, the reverse is true. Anyone grafting an honest day’s work has her admiration. It’s laziness that appals her.
Her friends will be few and far between, but she’ll have known them for decades. These friends will be fiercely defensive of her, and they’ll have to be because this female doesn’t take fools gladly.
An INTJ woman also has a dry, dark sense of humour. She delivers her punchlines with aplomb, with her sharp, cutting tongue. Once you get to know her, you get this dark humour. Remember, her humour is one way of weeding out timewasters.
Another point is that an INTJ will want nothing to do with the types who post selfies on social media. Or those who try and garner sympathy from others’ tragedies. She knows that to be a well-rounded person you need validation from the inside, and not other people’s opinions.
As I said earlier, this woman won’t settle just to be in a relationship. She’d much rather be on her own. A female INTJ may not want children either. Actually, you could say she doesn’t really have a maternal bone in her. But she does love animals. And she may have several pets that she adores.
Men would say this woman is a hard nut to crack. She’ll need a partner that she believes is superior to her. She likes a challenge and, therefore, she can’t date someone of lesser intelligence.
I would like to finish with a quote that perfectly sums up the INTJ female:
“And the princess lived happily ever after in her own big castle with all of her own money and she took care of herself. The End.”
Are you an INTJ? Do you relate to the description above? Please share your thoughts with us.
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I am an INTJ-A and agree with all in this article, except I wanted to be a mother more than anything and love my son very much!! I also love being a woman and kind of girly girl, as I love high-quality clothing, but more of the athletic type and simple in dress, do not wear a lot of heavy makeup or tons of jewelry.
Both this post and the comments were finally so accurate.
To clarify, maternal INTJ for me meant starting to scrutinize the men I knew as "father material" or not. I put an age limit on this in case I happened to intersect any. I didn't find that in time (or ever really...), but it ultimately changed how I scrutinized men in general with regard to me. I decided that this process makes me a good mother despite never having had any children.
Otherwise, what she meant by "superior" means someone I can't best. For a man to win my permanent respect and presence in his abode, I'd have to at least have that feeling. As a "tough nut to crack", occasionally giving me a run for my money will do. I actually dig masculinity.
I have heard that us INTJs (female) are misogynists. Amazingly, I get that. I can't explain it, but I get it. I just dig all things masculine (including some endeavors), though I am a heterosexual female. I usually lean organically to a male point of view. I can't explain it, but that's just what it is.
Mostly right . . . I'm super maternal though. I do have to make myself be cuddly after my kids reach a certain age when I feel like they shouldn't be so clingy, but I know it's important, so I do. I think it's somewhat wrapped up in my belief system and interests though because I'm super interested in child-rearing practices and what childhood lifestyle and parenting leads to the best adult.