Do You Feel Like You Don’t Belong Here? 4 Reasons Why It May Be a Good Thing

Published by
Anna LeMind, B.A.

Do you feel like you don’t belong here, in this world and society? You will be surprised to know that it may actually be a good thing.

We grow up believing that in order to be happy, we need to belong somewhere – a society, a country, a social circle, and finally, a family.

The desire to be a part of something bigger than ourselves seems to be our innate need, which probably has evolutionary roots (remember the well-known notion that human is a social animal?). As Wikipedia states, “belongingness is the human emotional need to be an accepted member of a group.”

But what happens in the case of people who don’t only lack this need but also feel that they don’t really fit in this world? Some individuals don’t simply consider themselves different from the rest – they actually have different tastes, ways of thinking, and priorities in life. They don’t like popular things and activities and don’t go after the goals most people pursue.

They may seem a sort of weirdos to those around them, but the truth is that there is a bright side of being a “misfit.”

Today, we will discuss four categories of people who are very likely to have a sense of detachment from the world because of their emotional and mental makeup. Moreover, it’s not a bad thing at all and is, in fact, an indication of increased awareness and sensitivity.

1. Deep thinkers

Sadly, the society we live in is giving more and more importance to primitive instincts and material needs. So it makes sense why individuals capable of deep thought may feel like they don’t belong here.

If you are a deep thinker, then you probably know what truly matters in life. That’s why seeing people around you chasing ephemeral goals and being interested in meaningless stuff is so disappointing. It’s not only disappointing – sometimes, it makes you wonder what you are doing here, among these people, and feel like you come from another world.

2. Old souls

Old souls often feel like they don’t belong here, especially when growing up. Being passionate about unpopular things may make others pick up on your differences and tease you for it. And this can be painful in your awkward childhood and teenage years, making you feel like a misfit who doesn’t have a place in this world.

In your adult years, this gap separating you from other people only becomes bigger. However, you find your path in life and don’t care the same about what they think about you.

3. Empaths

Empaths are so sensitive to the emotions and energy of other people that they may find it uncomfortable to be around them. If you are an empath, you know that every time you watch a news broadcast or learn something sad about someone you know, you get truly upset.

All these side effects of being an empath can also provoke a sense of detachment. And it’s no surprise – there is so much greed, cruelty, and violence in today’s world that an empath may suffer, being a part of it.

4. People who experience a spiritual awakening

A spiritual awakening is a great experience that elevates you to a higher level of consciousness and turns you into a spiritually evolved being. However, it is also paired with painful feelings and experiences because fundamental changes are never easy.

Not only do you start to wonder about the existence, reconsidering your life decisions and relationships, but you may also feel detached from those around you and the world in general. It’s all because you are becoming more aware and understand things you previously turned a blind eye to.

If you feel like you don’t belong here, remember that there is nothing wrong with you.

Instead of worrying about what others think and seeking their approval, try to find your passion and life purpose. And it’s fine if it doesn’t seem attractive or “cool” to most people. The point is that it should fill your life with meaning and happiness.

Did any of the above-described things ring true for you? We would love to hear your thoughts on this.

If you are feeling like a misfit, you may want to read my recent articles that provide some guidance for coping with this emotional state:

When the flood of comments came in response to this article, I realized that there were far more people who felt like they didn’t belong here, in this world and society, than I had imagined.

Inspired by this fact, I wrote the book The Power of Misfits: How to Find Your Place in a World You Don’t Fit In to help all those introverts, empaths, and deep thinkers who feel alien to modern society. If you are feeling this way and are looking for answers, you may want to check my book on Amazon.

View Comments

  • Great article, definitely hits home as I has felt much like a "Stranger in a Strange Land" for most of my life. I have learned to value difference in myself and in others. While it has been difficult at time to resist the pressures to conform, it has been worthwhile learning to become an authentic human being.

  • I get a little worried when I read this acticle, because I think I might have a tendency to believe in a "myth" of separation....that I believe myself to be more different and disconnected form everybody else, than is actually the case.

  • In continuation of the above comment on the myth of separation, i want to share that I also feel like there are some areas of life that I don't belong to, even though id like to. Its as if there is something wrong about me that precludes me from belong to certain things. So as a consequence i don't allow myself to explore those areas that i actually feel like belonging to......

  • Raedibg this article made me feel like it waa describing me. Absolitely spot on.

    Thanks Anna for this wonderful post. I now know there are people who also feel the way I do and i'm not alone.

  • What about the... "...is there not more..?" category???

    Once, a few decades ago, someone called me 'Jack the Jacker'... I think due to my seeming inability to stay with one career choice.
    Army, Driver, Carpet fitter, Paramedic, the list goes on...

    I have never stayed in the one house for more than 7 years, I have never felt a belonging.
    I am not Antisocial, and have enjoyed the company of others, but have always felt apart.

    Is there not more?

    Money? Actually, the things money affords you... Cars, clothes, travel etc.
    I am not a narcissist, I'm not handsome, nor ugly. I don't deserve more than you or others, nor do I deserve less;

    But, really... Is there not more?

    I feel the need to belong, but is there not more?

Published by
Anna LeMind, B.A.