What makes women with INTP type so rare? Probably, a set of unusual personality traits and quirks, most of which are not typical of women. If you ever happen to meet an INTP female, you’d better forget about gender stereotypes as she will be nothing like the society’s image of how a woman should be.
Here are some of the quirky traits and perceptions which will only ring true for a woman with INTP personality type:
Most women follow certain self-care and beauty routines every day to look more attractive. Washing your hair, doing some hair styling and applying makeup are sacred rituals for any woman. However, an INTP female may find it difficult to stick with these daily self-care activities. I’m not saying that we shower once a month or never make up our face – we are just not so concerned with our physical appearance.
INTPs, both men and women, tend to be more focused on the things which are beyond the material side of existence. For this reason, it just doesn’t make sense for us to spend hours of our time for the sake of looking better. We’d better read an interesting book or immerse in an inner dialogue on a meaningful topic.
Some men think that all women enjoy things like shopping, manicure and reading fashion magazines. Well, it’s certainly not the case with female INTPs. We are just not interested in this stuff and are bored to spend our time and energy on it, for the reasons described in the previous point. This also makes it difficult for us to relate to other women, especially those who love talking about nails, celebrities and clothes.
But it’s not only about interests – we struggle to make friends with other women simply because our way of thinking is different. Sometimes it feels that we can easier relate to men than to women because we highly rely on logical thinking (IN(T)P stands for thinking). So all those jokes about the “women’s logic” are certainly not about female INTPs.
Housekeeping and cooking are certainly not our cup of tea, which is another way an INTP female breaks gender stereotypes. INTP is an example of chaotic mind, so anything that has to do with putting things into order is not our thing. So if you are a man who seeks a perfect housewife who will cook and clean, be sure that a relationship with an INTP female is not going to work.
This is mainly caused by the traits discussed in the first point – anything about the material side of life is not of great interest for INTPs. As long as we have something great to occupy our mind with, we just don’t notice that mess in the room and it doesn’t bother us at all.
Another reason why women with INTP personality are such bad housewives is that we are incredibly impractical. According to the Myers–Briggs Type Indicator, there are sensing and intuitive types. The first ones have pretty good practical skills while the latter ones (I(N)TP stands for intuition) are better at working with theoretical concepts.
This basically means that we would find it easier to solve a mathematical equation (if we are math geeks, of course) than to choose the right fabric softener for our washing machine. Sometimes, these kinds of mundane tasks make us feel completely incapable and helpless.
This lack of practical thinking also influences our ability to engage in social interaction. INTPs are some of the most socially awkward and quirky personalities who seem to lack any social skills.
It doesn’t mean that we hate people and don’t like to be involved in an interesting discussion though. We just don’t do well with superficial connections which are based solely on the social obligation. And we absolutely can’t stand small talk.
That’s why an INTP female may be perceived as arrogant or weird by the people she doesn’t feel connected to.
Most women adore flowers, cute gifts and other expressions of love in its romantic sense. But not the INTP ones. We tend to look for the essence of things, so more superficial expressions of affection like giving teddy bears or calling sweet names don’t touch us.
What really touches us though is to feel understood and appreciated for our personality and intellect. For an INTP female, there is nothing better than to have a deep conversation about meaningful things with her significant other.
Independence in any sphere of life is one of the highest priorities for an INTP. For this reason, people with this personality type rarely work in office jobs or public/military service. So it’s highly unlikely to see an INTP female working as a personal assistant or a client manager.
The same is true for relationships – an INTP needs healthy boundaries and a certain degree of freedom. This personality type also tends to be highly reserved (INTP stands for introversion), so we need pretty much time to stay alone with our thoughts.
That’s why an INTP female will never tolerate possessive behaviors in a relationship. She’d better be alone than with a man who tells her what to do or where to or not to go.
Since this personality type tends to highly rely on independence and needs a personal space, starting a family can be a great challenge for an INTP female. Even if we are lucky to have a great man in our life, the idea of having children really frightens us. Because in this case, we will have to sacrifice so many things that are essential for us – privacy, alone time, personal freedom. And we will also have to face so many mundane problems which accompany the upbringing of kids.
The truth is that INTPs rarely make great parents because we fail to devote ourselves to our children as well as give them the necessary emotional support. So an INTP female is very likely to have fears and doubts about her ability to become a good mother.
As you see from the above, women with INTP personality type bash so many gender stereotypes about how a woman should be, think and behave. We certainly don’t look like the image of a perfect woman the society wants us to strive for.
Do you know anyone with these characteristics or are you an INTP female yourself? If you are unsure, you can check out the detailed description of the Myers-Briggs personality types to find out which type resonates with you most of all.
Please feel free to share your experiences in the comments below.
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INTP female here.
Agree with most of this statement. I don't care for flowers, teddy bears etc etc cause it's a waste of money. It's a nice gesture but a waste of money. Never feared becoming a mother. Am a good one.
Work, never be a personal assistant, I'd really rather not have to work with people, from home is BEST if that were not possible, I'd require a job with very little interacting with people. Actually truthfully, what I'd prefer to be/do is be a stay at home "soccer" mom, 2 kids MAX! Raise a family.
I live and have a great great time in my head, thinking and re-thinking. Being in my head is quite amusing and entertaining and I'd have a lot of time for that.. cleaning the house/cooking
INTP female raised by an INTP female here.
I didn't really agree with most of it? It felt like it was just trying to stereotype women, men, and INTP women. I agreed more with most of the comments above.
I don't care for makeup or looking nice and I am a terrible housewife. (I can't even keep one room clean...)
However, I have zero problem making female friends. I actually feel like I relate much more to girls than guys. And anyways, I have fairly well-rounded interests, so I did like some girly stuff, just not a ton of it.
As for the being bad parents thing? Well, my mother is an INTP, so I definitely strongly disagree with that.
Newly discovered INTP female
The whole stereotype of us being emotionless husks, men and women need to die. I don't want to write a whole soliloquy about myself, but I want to address here on some things that I do agree with and disagree with
#1: I care about my looks. I was always a very well put together person. How I shop and buy my clothes are very simple. I see something that I like and I buy it in about 4-5 different colors. I don't really like to spend time shopping forever, but I do like to look good. I don't do my make up in the mirror for a long time, but when I was younger, it took me about 10 minutes. Now I don't wear make up at all, because as you get older, you do tend to not care as much, and I think that generally goes universally to be honest.
#2: I see different reviews with this, but I actually wholeheartedly agree with this one. I could never relate to women and I still can't. I've always been able to relate to men and I still can. Women are too catty and filled with too much drama which is something that I try to avoid like the plague. I don't get that with men.
#3: I agree with this only in the respect of I don't really like that traditionalistic bullshit, so in that respect, if a man wants a traditional wife, I'm not it, but if a man wants a good wife, then here I am. I'm not like average woman, and I have been told this.
#4: When I was younger, I agree with this completely. As I've become older, I noticed that going on numerous interviews and being a manager multiple times actually helped me with social interaction as well as working on my assertiveness. Was I a good manager? Not really, but dealing with different personality types did help me assert myself better with people as well as learning how to socialize better and maintain eye contact.
#5: I used to be affectionate when I was younger, and I would still state that I am, but what I can say is this: diamonds and all of that materialistic BS really doesn't move me in a relationship. What moves me is when a man randomly thinks of me and purchases something like that, when he wants to learn with me and take interest in my thoughts. I don't mind PDA, and cuddles and things of that nature and I don't even mind being goofy (I prefer it actually). Just give me my space when I need it, and don't be intrusive, and we will be fine.
#6: I VERY MUCH value my independence. I've valued it honestly since I was younger. As far as the healthy boundaries, I actually didn't know how to set them for myself because I wasn't taught self love, or self respect or anything like that. I had to learn that on my own. I still have trouble setting healthy boundaries, but it's much better now than what it was when I was younger. MUCH better.
#7: I agree with this one, even though I have a son. I never was the one who liked children to be honest, but now because I have a son, he's expanded my horizon on why kids are actually amazing. Do I still have issues bonding with my son and other kids? Why of course! But I make more of an effort to try now. I don't want my son to live life conventionally and I will see to it that he doesn't. Most parents buy their kids toys; I like to buy my son toys that he can learn from. Since my son is forever going to have a STEM parent (I am a medical junkie/knowledge hoarder on that respect), I just bought him this past Christmas a book on the human body as well as a globe that turns into a night light that shows all of the constellations in the Galaxy.
INTP women are definitely something that many don't understand BECAUSE the general descriptions are pandered to men. I do respect the author for trying to understand us as many people do not.
....and this is a bonus issue with INTPs: we try to write short explanations and they NEVER end up that way.
This is an excellent article and a very accurate assessment of the INTP female personality. I identified with it 100%. Ignore all of the emotional whiners who are trying to hijack this personality type, and redefine it, just because it's now trendy for one to be an INTP. They're just a bunch of attention-seeking ESFPs, thirsty for the spotlight, as per usual.
I agree INTP is a dying breed (re: women).
I believe INTP women need to interact.
I do not know how to do this.
I do not want to.waste slot of time reading blogs.
I would like to support other INTP women in my community.
I would like to know how to do that.
I am not a lesbian. Understand that. Please