“Things only introvert or extroverts will understand!” Well, what about the ambiverts? Wait?! What?!
I have been an extrovert for the better part of my life, or at least I thought I was. Come to think of it, maybe I’ve been an introvert all of my life? On the one hand, I thrive within the company of others. It energizes me, but THEN, it drains me. On the other hand, I also enjoy my quiet time alone to reflect, but THEN, I’m lonely and my thoughts are all over the place.
I never really “fit” into either category very well. Personality test results are always inconclusive for me. I appear to be all over the place. Well, it turns out that I am both an introvert and extrovert, or neither, depending on the context of how you look at things. I’m not confused, I’m just an ambivert. The term “ambivert” may be new to you, but it may also define and shed some light on your own personality type.
To simplify it, an ambivert is a person who has both introversion and extroversion qualities and may bounce between the two. Sounds a tad bi-polar, right? It can seem that way sometimes, but honestly, it’s more of a need for balance.
The ambivert loves social settings and being around others, but we also need our solitude. Too much time on either the introvert or extrovert side will make us moody and unhappy. Balance is the key for us ambiverts!
An ambivert is rather balanced for the most part, or at least we try to be. We seek social settings, like meeting new people, and enjoy the company of others. We aren’t overly loud and aggressive like the extrovert can be, but we enjoy being outgoing and do so on our own terms. We also enjoy our solitude but aren’t quite as extreme with it as the introvert. We need both settings rather equally to be fully happy.
As I mentioned above, we don’t function too well in either direction for extensive amounts of time. We can neither be the life of the party all the time nor constantly spend time on our own. When this happens, we may find ourselves feeling bored or exhausted. Again, we need balance.
With that being said, the ambivert can sometimes be confusing to others. Having both traits, we can sway too far in either direction rather easily. Our behaviors are likely to change with the situation, and we can easily become “unbalanced.” We enjoy doing something… until we don’t. These behavior “fluctuations” are a result of our need to stay balanced between the different levels of stimulation.
We have our personal preferences, of course, but we adjust pretty well in most situations (as long as we don’t stay there too long and get bored or unbalanced). Ambiverts can work well alone or in groups. We can take charge or step down when the situation calls for it. We also have game plans in order for most things or potential problems that may arise. On the downside, this level of flexibility can cause us to be indecisive.
An ambivert also has a pretty good understanding of people overall and different surroundings/settings. We are highly intuitive and can sense the emotions of others while likely being able to relate to them in many ways. We aren’t afraid to talk, but we also like to observe and listen. Ambiverts are likely to know when to help or stay back.
Having some understanding of the different traits can help you to know yourself and others better and perhaps make you more successful in your daily life. So, if you can relate to the above, you just may be an ambivert too.
Do you think you might be an ambivert? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!
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I found your article vaguely interesting,however I would like to take you to task over the use of the term Bipolar as an adjective,REALLY NOT OK.This type of lazy language diminishes the horror that is Bipolar in the same way that using the term OCD would when describing being a bit anal about something.Those of you who have never experienced the horror of being awake for up to 360 hours,the tiredness the dysphoric states never mind the endless depression & urge to die that is Thanatopsis can have no idea how insulting it is to read this as a description of a state of mind.Pick different more accurate language,be more precise.I have dealt with 3 psychologists whilst I have been learning to manage this challenging disorder,& found them to be of limited utility,one was interesting to talk to,but that was more to do with his degree in existentialist philosophy,we compared notes on cognitive programming modalities.He concluded he had nothing useful to add to my existing knowledge base,the next one told me he found my knowledge intimidating.My mother studied Psychology at one of the best courses in the UK,she concluded that there was little of any use to me within that discipline.Up your game,don't use lazy trite language.It is offensive.Good luck with your career,I suggest you have a look at the transpersonal psychology movement,you may find it interesting,esp Stan Grofs work.It's not really my cup of tea,I prefer to get down to nuts & bolts solutions.But I have been told that I am a well balanced personality type with a severe biochemical imbalance,& so far using the knowledge gleaned from reading about Psychedelic science,cognitive programming modalities & many other diverse topics I have managed to find solutions to many of the problems this disorder throws up,without the need of councilors or psychologists,being able to read & think on my own.Luv 1Wheel
I'm sorry that you found my use of the word "bipolar" offensive. However, my sole purpose was using the word "bipolar" as an adjective meaning, "having or relating to two polar extremes" which in this case is the introvert and extrovert "extremes." I was not in anyway making light off a major mental illness and would never dream of doing so. I'm sorry that you have suffered and that your "experience" with mental health professionals wasn't a productive one. I'm glad you have found your own way to treat your condition yourself. I am a strong advocate of self-help. Be well!
I am also interested in the human mind and what "conditions" us and our perceptions. Intro, extro, ambi...I think all these can define pretty much everyone...all three basically covers the whole gambit of human emotion so youre bound to fall into one of these categories. The problem is though that we are not so easily defined. We are so much more than these simple labels. Some people love crowds only when they benefit from them. Greed. Some people love being alone simply cause theyre too shy to join the crowd. Fear. Some peoples energy is drained from others cause theyre too self involved to realize that there is more than one set of eyes perceiving things. Narcissism. Some people are energized by people simply cause these people make them feel wanted. Insecurity. I love reading stuff like this, id classify myself as an ambivert if I was simplifying who I was to these three categories. I only say this because there are people who will read this and once they believe that they found out the reason why they shy away from crowds, or are.overzealous at work, theyll convince.themselves that they do these things.cause they are.an extro, intro, or ambi. Theyll then never attempt to bend.the.envelope cause.they already believe they know whats written inside. So im just rambling so that people may realize that there is a ton of other things that influence who you are and make up your nature. Dig deeper. Find out who you truly are because only then can you see the world for its beauty and enjoy it for what it is. Dont just bend.the.envelope. fucking break it!
Thanks for sharing, Derek! You are right, it does go way beyond the introvert, extrovert, and ambivert label. Self discovery is a process that takes a lot of digging and time.
AMEN AIMEE, AMEN. 30 years after my first Myers Briggs Survey testing its still true... I Am-bivert and happy for it, though it does sometimes confuse others.
Thanks for the topic and sanity check.
Thank you! Glad to hear it and thanks for sharing!
Finally a different view. Helped me lot to find where I stand.
Glad to hear it!
Kept wondering why i dont fit to any of the cases, intro or extro. I like to dance with, I like to party I like to speak loud, sometimes all I want is to be just myself with my thought and do my work/explore my ideas, and talk to no1.
Thx for the article, now I have an answer!