Relationships with narcissists are fraught at the best of times. Narcissistic people are selfish pathological liars, who will gaslight and exploit until you are no longer useful. Narcissists groom partners with a charm offensive that would put Disney to shame.
Narcissists entice and beguile you, and so starts the manipulation and abuse. The relationship confuses you, but how can you know when it’s over? As narcissists are such mercurial and devious creatures, it’s unclear when a narcissist has ended a relationship.
So, what are the telltale signs a narcissist is done with you?
What happens when a narcissist is done with you?
Narcissists are masters of manipulation. They will keep you around so long as they can benefit from the relationship. Think of the narcissist as a cat; you are the dead mouse. So, long as the narcissist gets something from you, they’ll continue playing.
Narcissists only have one thing in mind; themselves. They don’t care about your feelings or what you’ve invested in the relationship. Narcissists are cold and brutal when they are done with you.
Here are signs a narcissist has moved on.
19 telltale signs a narcissist is done with you
1. You feel something has changed
How to know when a narcissist is done with you? You’ll feel it. Always trust your gut instinct. Has the atmosphere shifted? Is there a coldness or a withdrawal of affection? Is your partner critical or belittling towards you? If you notice a change, this could signal the end.
2. The narcissist will ghost you
Narcissists have no empathy. They don’t feel guilt or remorse or consider your feelings. The easiest way for a narcissist to end a relationship is to ghost you. They will stop all communication, they won’t reply to texts, calls or emails. It’s like they’ve fallen off the planet.
2. They will drain you financially
Before the narcissist finishes with you, they’ll make sure they’ve bled you dry. After all, if you have money or assets, you are still useful to them. Change the passwords and PINs for your bank accounts if you notice your narcissistic partner going cold and acting aloof.
3. The narcissist ignores things you say
Narcissists do not waste energy on pointless endeavours. Once they’ve used you and you are no longer useful to them, there is no need for them to acknowledge your presence. Remember, narcissists are immune to social etiquette.
4. Nothing you do is right
Does your partner belittle or criticise you in public and private? Do you feel you cannot please your partner? Has the honeymoon period worn off? Once your partner was charming and adoring, now you disgust them.
5. The narcissist will be brutally honest with you
When a narcissist is done with you, they don’t have to hide their true feelings. They can say what they think, which is usually derogatory and unkind.
If they used you for money, they’ll tell you. They will mock your naivete at their charm offensive. Once a narcissist has drained you, they take pleasure in telling you all about their game plan.
6. You get the narcissistic stare
To a narcissist, you are a pathetic, weak and disgusting sap who fell for their deception and lies. We all know it is rude to stare, but a narcissist cannot help themselves. You’ll know a narcissist is done with you when you catch them glaring at you with cold, dead eyes.
7. The narcissist stops begging you to stay
Narcissists will do anything to stay in the relationship if there’s something still in it for them. One of the signs a narcissist is done with you is when they no longer care whether you stay or go. They might even dare you or tell you that you don’t have the balls to go.
8. They are never available
Once upon a time, the narcissist would love bomb you and shower you with compliments and affection. Nowadays, you never see them. They are not at home; they come home late and you cannot get hold of them when you need to.
When they distance themselves from you, it is one of the signs the narcissist has moved on.
9. They are blatantly unfaithful
How does a narcissist end a relationship? They will cheat on you. However, the narcissist will not try to hide their affairs. They’ll be more likely to throw their cheating ways in your face.
The narcissist will take pleasure in upsetting you. Narcissists are lazy, parasitic people. If they can get you to end the relationship, it saves them the job.
10. They accuse you of cheating
It doesn’t matter whether you have caught a narcissist cheating, they will accuse you of the same behaviour. This is a gaslighting technique narcissists use to throw you off balance.
11. They say horrible things
How to know if a narcissist is finished with you? They turn nasty. They will highlight your weaknesses, tell you what a fool you were to believe their lies and ridicule your feelings.
When a narcissist is done with you, it’s like night and day. You feel as if you are dealing with Jekyll and Hyde.
12. They become super-confident
Have you noticed a change in your partner’s self-esteem? One of the signs a narcissist is done with you is over-confidence. The narcissist brags about how they can live without you, how they are so much better than you and why you are lucky they tolerate you.
13. They accuse you of being jealous
As well as a heightened sense of confidence, the narcissist will accuse you of being jealous of them.
Narcissists have short memories, so they will forget how they pursued you and all the compliments they gave you about your life. They will turn it around and state that you went after them because they are so amazing.
14. They have a makeover
Narcissists are cunning and manipulative. They know they have nothing to offer a new partner, so they have to present themselves in the best light possible. If you see them taking special care of their clothes, hair, or makeup, it is a sign the narcissist is finished with you.
15. They groom new partners
Now that the narcissist is done with you, they want to move on quickly. This means grooming a new victim.
With the rose-tinted glasses off, you can see exactly how they trapped you into a relationship. They are using the same love-bombing techniques they did with you to trap potential new partners.
16. They are physically abusive
Sometimes the narcissist will be physically abusive as well as verbally. By the time the narcissist is finished with you, they have absolutely no feelings for you. You are nothing to them, so it doesn’t take long for any verbal insults to morph into physical abuse.
17. They will ignore your friends and family
At the start of the relationship, the narcissist had to win over your close circle of people. Now that they have decided the relationship is over, they don’t have to pretend anymore. They will drop the charade and show their true colours.
18. You cannot do anything right
When a narcissist is done with you, no matter what you do, you can’t do anything right in their eyes. Sometimes you think your very presence irritates them. The more you try, the worse it gets. Look for signs such as eye-rolling, deep sighs and interruptions.
19. They are always angry with you
Narcissists’ irritation quickly moves into anger when they want out of the relationship. This is one of the major signs a narcissist is done with you.
At the start of your relationship, the narcissist bent over backwards to entice and romance you. Now they invent things to be angry at with you.
Your relationship with a narcissist is nothing more than a series of carefully constructed lies designed to entrap you. Because you cannot trust anything they say, how can you spot the signs a narcissist is done with you? Trust your gut. If something seems off, it probably is.
Best of all, don’t get involved with a narcissist.
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