We all face ill-wishers, when we set goals and begin to reach them, no matter at what stage we are now: sceptics, critics, people who taunt us or say that we won’t succeed in what we do.
Such people are a very powerful force, because even with “innocent” jokes and comments they can make you slow down or even stop moving towards your goals.
How to deal with ill-wishers? Of course, they are all different, but here are a few good general tips:
1. First, learn to identify them.
Sometimes we just do not realize that someone is our ill-wisher. They can be close friends or family members, so when they say negative things, we often believe them and take them to heart. You should remember that there is a big difference between realists and sceptics. Learn to listen to what others say, and note your reaction. If that upsets you and makes you feel depressed, then probably these people are your ill-wishers.
2. Think maybe they are right.
As was mentioned above, sometimes they are just trying to be realistic. They may have good reasons for their negative attitude. Take a step back and think objectively why they have doubts and see a real obstacle, and if so, then try to figure out how to overcome it. If you really want to reach your goal, you will find a solution. If your ill-wishers are certainly wrong, just move on.
3. Reject any negative thoughts they bring.
Enemies will always try to bring to you their negative thoughts, which can raise doubts about your rightness. Then it can grow and affect the way you feel about your goals. Stop these negative thoughts as soon as possible! Replace them with positive beliefs. Do not let them beat you!
4. Understand that you will always have enemies, and don’t take them to heart
In everyone’s life there is at least one enemy. You can not avoid seeing them but you can avoid listening to them. Just smile and do not pay attention to their words. They will not be able to affect you if you ignore their words.
5. Try to win them over.
Sometimes ill-wishers are your close people and you can’t ignore them. If so, it is better to enlist the help of these people, rather than fight them. Try to do it as soon as possible. Tell them that it is very important to you, and you need their help. Tell them that you understand their concerns, but you really need a positive attitude and support. If they are your close people who care about you, they will become your best allies.
6. Laugh with them.
Sometimes people feel uncomfortable when you take some changes and in order to get rid of this discomfort, they come up with different jokes and begin to taunt you. They just do not know how else to react. Be aware of this and just laugh. If you take their words as nothing more but just a good joke, it disarms them. They can continue making jokes at you, but it won’t longer affect you if you’ll just laugh at them.
7. Have ready-made counter-arguments and use them.
Sometimes people are just misinformed about what is happening. They may misunderstand what you are doing. Think on all their arguments and prepare your counter-arguments. Conduct your small research and justify the correctness of your actions. Then try to “enlighten” your ill-wishers. If you do it correctly, with a positive and sincere attitude, you can manage to make a person listen to you, and perhaps even change his opinion. If you fail, then at least you will be much better informed about their arguments and won’t let them give birth to doubts in your head.
8. Be sure that you are doing something good.
Sometimes there is nothing you can do about it. You can’t convince them, you can’t avoid them, you can’t laugh with them… Therefore, you should just ignore them and continue telling yourself that when you reach your goal, it will be a reward for enduring these people.
Remember that enemies will always exist in your life. But they are just an additional obstacle on the way towards your goal. If you look for solutions, you can defeat them or make them your allies.
Copyright © 2017 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint,
Latest posts by Anna LeMind (see all)
- 6 Reasons Why INTP Personality Type Is One of the Quirkiest and Most Misunderstood - February 17, 2017
- 5 Struggles of Being an Old Soul in a Young Body - January 16, 2017
- 6 Reasons Why Intelligent People Fail to Be Happy - November 24, 2016
- 5 Times You Know You Are Rebelling Against Modern Society (Even If It Doesn’t Feel This Way) - November 5, 2016
- 5 Reasons Why Introverts Love Autumn - September 22, 2016