Do You Feel Like You Don’t Belong Here? 4 Reasons Why It May Be a Good Thing

/, Food for thought, Introvert's World, Personal Development, Personality, Self-Improvement, Spirituality/Do You Feel Like You Don’t Belong Here? 4 Reasons Why It May Be a Good Thing

dont belong here

Do you feel like you don’t belong here, in this world and society? You will be surprised to know that it may actually be a good thing.

We grow up believing that in order to be happy, we need to belong somewhere – a society, a country, a social circle and finally, a family.

The desire to be a part of something bigger than ourselves seems to be our innate need, which probably has evolutionary roots (remember the well-known notion that human is a social animal?). As Wikipedia states, “belongingness is the human emotional need to be an accepted member of a group.”

But what happens in the case of people who don’t only lack this need but also feel that they don’t really fit in this world? Some individuals don’t simply consider themselves different from the rest – they actually have different tastes, way of thinking and priorities in life. They don’t like popular things and activities and don’t go after the goals most people pursue.

They may seem a sort of weirdos to those around them, but the truth is that there is a bright side of being a “misfit.”

Today, we will discuss four categories of people who are very likely to have a sense of detachment from the world because of their emotional and mental makeup. Moreover, it’s not a bad thing at all and is, in fact, an indication of an increased awareness and sensitivity.

1. Deep thinkers

Sadly, the society we live in is giving more and more importance to the primitive instincts and material needs. So it makes sense why individuals capable of deep thought may feel like they don’t belong here.

If you are a deep thinker, then you probably know what truly matters in life. That’s why seeing people around you chasing ephemeral goals and being interested in meaningless stuff is so disappointing. It’s not only disappointing – sometimes, it makes you wonder what you are doing here, among these people, and feel like you come from another world.

2. Old souls

Old souls often feel like they don’t belong here, especially when growing up. Being passionate about unpopular things may make others pick up on your differences and tease you for it. And this can be painful in your awkward childhood and teenage years, making you feel like a misfit who doesn’t have a place in this world.

In your adult years, this gap separating you from other people only becomes bigger. However, you find your path in life and don’t care the same about what they think about you.

3. Empaths

Empaths are so sensitive to the emotions and energy of other people that they may find it uncomfortable to be around them. If you are an empath, you know that every time you watch a news broadcast or learn something sad about someone you know, you get truly upset.

All these side effects of being an empath can also provoke a sense of detachment. And it’s no surprise – there is so much greed, cruelty and violence in today’s world that an empath may suffer, being a part of it.

4. People who experience a spiritual awakening

A spiritual awakening is a great experience that elevates you to a higher level of consciousness and turns you into a spiritually evolved being. However, it is also paired with painful feelings and experiences because fundamental changes are never easy.

Not only do you start to wonder about the existence, reconsidering your life decisions and relationships, but you may also feel detached from those around you and the world in general. It’s all because you are becoming more aware and understand things you previously turned a blind eye to.

If you feel like you don’t belong here, remember that there is nothing wrong with you. Instead of worrying about what others think and seeking their approval, try to find your passion and life purpose. And it’s fine if it doesn’t seem attractive or “cool” to most people. The point is that it should fill your life with meaning and happiness.

Did any of the above-described things ring true for you? We would love to hear your thoughts on this.

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Anna LeMind

Anna is the founder and lead editor of the website Learning-mind.com. She is passionate about learning new things and reflecting on thought-provoking ideas. She writes about science, psychology and other related topics. She is particularly interested in topics regarding introversion, consciousness and subconscious, perception, human mind's potential, as well as the nature of reality and the universe.




Copyright © 2017 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.

51 Comments

  1. Audrey May 30, 2017 at 11:20 pm - Reply

    I identify with all of the above. I am 38 now, and this feeling is intensifying to the point of anxiety. The feeling that I don’t belong here. That I am a tourist in this world. That my soul has been somehow misplaced. The feeling that I am wasting my time, like I am sitting in a waiting room anticipating my name being called. I am sure that I do not feel relationships as deeply as others. It makes me feel like a bad mother and wife. I realize that no lottery winnings or dream vacation or job promotion will make me truly happy or content. I keep having these VERY odd VERY specific coincidences, far beyond a song in your car playing that you were just humming in the house. More like studying for college, turning a page and reading a scientific theory title and an actor on tv stating the name of that scientific theory at the exact same time. It was Coulomb’s Law, by the way, not something common like the big bang theory. Or drawing a Christmas ornament for your daughter to color, her recognizing the shape and stating “Oh, a Christmas ornament!” and a Christmas ornament falling off of the tree and rolling across the floor with no one around it at the EXACT same time. This stuff happens to me almost daily. Sometimes several times a day. I try to dismiss most of it but some coincidences are just too specific. It is starting to freak my family out.

    I try not to watch the news or read articles because I can’t let go of all of the bad in this world. I will spend hours analyzing the horrors I see and hear and find myself almost always emotionally drained. I am physically tired ALL of the time. My doctors blame it on life long hormone imbalance. I think there is much more to it. Medication cannot cure what is going on with me. It has been able to distract me from it for short periods of time but the feeling of not belonging is too strong to be repressed for long.

    My question is, what do we do about it? I am so anxious for answers. The thoughts consume my mind. I feel like I am waiting to die just so I can, hopefully, finally find out why I feel the way I do. I am positive that I do not belong here. This all feels like smoke and mirrors. Just a distraction from something much more important.

    I would love for like minded individuals to contact me. This feeling is so overwhelming. I am glad to see I am not alone.

    • Linda May 31, 2017 at 5:18 pm - Reply

      Audrey,hi I read about the feelings you are experiencing,I too feel that I don’t belong in this world,it is very overwhelming to the point that,I struggle too be happy,my children,and other people around me,even though I know them,i feel so out of this world,I can’t even explain it’s almost like your at a store,and you see all these people,that look to me like robots,all I here is a bunch of voices,even at funniest event,I feel so disconnected.i feel like I’m just going through the motions here on earth,waiting like you said just to find an answer! And waking up in the middle of the night laughing uncontrollably.like I was there in the other place so happy! Never recalling any dream I had.

    • Carly June 1, 2017 at 4:20 am - Reply

      Audrey, everything you said is exactly like me and made me feel so much better that i’m not alone in this. i need someone to talk to about this that i know truly understands. I hope for you to see this and write me back. more info about what i’m feeling: I’ve come to the conclusion that i am not depressed. for so many years i thought it was just depression and that i can get help. this is not the case. i’ve come to realize that the society and the world we live in today is so draining and too much for my empathetic brain to deal with. its so hard to type this because i honestly am so lost in my thoughts and feeling this constant confusion of why i’m here. things that make others so happy don’t excite me. i’m longing to just zone out from this world and find actual meaning. nobody i’ve ever met has ever come close to understanding me. i don’t even understand me. but everything hurts me and i am too just waiting for a way out. an answer to why i feel like this. to learn more about the universe and discover more of my subconsious abilities. i want to be free from this place.

      • gray June 28, 2017 at 5:32 am - Reply

        i feel this way too since i was a kid but i’m not depressed or sad and i think the only reason why i was struggling so bad with this is my thoughts we can’t change the world but we can change our thoughts and the way to view things and feel about them being sad and depressed about it will make it worst just accept it and try to live that way and i know it’s gonna be hard but do you wanna live your entire life miserable , you gotta fight it see the world from a positive view and trust me we can live and evaluate the things that we admire like complexity and deep thinking and awareness without being sad and miserable . then we can light the way for the world to follow .but we have to accept our selves before the world can accept us

    • Kay June 19, 2017 at 12:20 am - Reply

      All that you have said here in your post is identical to who I’am… this feeling I have is almost unbearable. I try desperately to compensate by helping others in order to fill some whate of a void.

    • K July 7, 2017 at 6:54 am - Reply

      Everything above relates to me too. I experience the same thing, the feelings are so deep. And I’m only 17.. coincidences also happen in my life so often that I’ve had to actually start writing them down. I think deeply all the time and I realize there’s no one I can relate to, barely even my family. Other people don’t make sense to me sometimes and I feel so disconnected and out of place all the time even when I’m by myself

    • Jen September 6, 2017 at 4:17 am - Reply

      When I read your comment, I had to think for a minute and ask myself, did I write this? But, I did not write this, you did. It’s exactly the same way that I’ve been feeling and get this, I’m 38 years old as well. I’ve always been strange, never felt like I fit in. I just come to think, I should just be by myself, because no-one understands and they all look at me like I’m nuts. It’s very refreshing to see a like minded person as me.

    • Eligh September 14, 2017 at 3:46 pm - Reply

      I can relate to all of what has been said,, the thing is though that it has only been in the last 2 to 3 years for me that it has become more apparent and pronounced. I have pretty much distanced myself from all friends that I have had mainly because I just cannot stand to be around them for too long as their energy just makes me so uncomfortable and lethargic that it caused me anxiety when hearing from a friend wanting to catch up.. I can’t watch TV because of the blatant brainwashing and mind numbing that they push on us people so I find myself constantly reading and trying to find a purpose. I would love to just pack up the necessities and head up to a mountain/forest and live among the nature and wildlife..

      • Ashlee September 18, 2017 at 6:26 am - Reply

        That is what I have been thinking as well, the best thing to do would be to escape into nature . I can relate to each and every one of you. I honestly don’t know how much longer I can just hang in there. I hate that I can’t just be happy, mostly so I don’t have to watch my family suffer because of it. I literally have 4 people in my life, my 2 daughters, my husband and my father. I too have contemplated the thought of depression, thinking that was what is wrong. Also, recently considering the notion of hormonal imbalances. But nothing makes more sense then all the things mentioned above. I truly feel everything stated in the article and everyones comments couldn’t be more spot on. However, I am still left with what to do about it all.. I’d love some suggestions if anyone has any. Although I think the mountain/forest idea might really be a good start. .

    • Tim September 25, 2017 at 3:31 am - Reply

      Wow you completely described me. It’s getting worse and worse or better and better. I don’t even know anymore. I have constant dreams also that happen just as I dreamed. It feels like a matrix and I keep seeing glitches. I’ve learned another language in my spare time to be ready to move my family to a country and city that I was told in many dreams to move to in order to avoid what’s coming on the earth. That sums up how I don’t “fit in” I constantly wonder if I’m the only one seeing the world this way and feeling like I’m an alien.

  2. Sabrina June 5, 2017 at 3:03 am - Reply

    I’ve been feeling this way as well.
    Especially today I was the mall and everyone seemed “fake”.
    I actually said to myself “I don’t belong here”
    I have a few close friends but the friendships aren’t as deep as they used to be and I don’t even bother with trying to have a boyfriend since they probably wouldn’t even understand.
    I used to self medicate to avoid it.
    Lately my counselor thinks I need to take medication but my gut instinct says no.
    I’m glad I’m not the only one out there that feels like this.

  3. Marlo June 9, 2017 at 6:30 am - Reply

    This is exactly how I feel, in every way. Since as far back as I can remember, from my earliest childhood days I have felt this way.
    The feeling that I don’t belong here amongst these strange, unreasonable, and cruel humans has always been so strong; that I am surprised that I made it this far without seeking”a way out”.

    I literally feel that I do not belong to the human race: They are so selfish and uncaring, and do not listen to reason; I cannot even communicate with them without dumbing myself so far down, that when I finally get out of a social situation, I feel completely exhausted.

    I have always been completely different from everyone else. From the way I think, what I am into, how I do things, EVERY single thing.
    If everyone was walking east, I would always be heading west.
    And I have always been made fun of for my differences, and it hurts so bad I have no choice but to pretend to be like everyone else.

    There is literally no one that I can talk to about this. No one.
    No friend, no family member, not my fiancé. I tried, but no one understands. They just get angry at me, scared of me, or just give me a strange look like I’m crazy.

    In all honesty, I am tired of this world.

  4. Brian June 22, 2017 at 4:42 am - Reply

    Hi everyone,

    This was such a blessing to remember that I am not alone in this feeling of being “different.” I have always thought of myself as a foreigner and stranger in this world, like the proverbial square peg trying to fit into a round hole. It has made me especially sad today, but this feeling has become fundamental for me since childhood. However, even as familiar as the feeling has become over the years, it never gets easier. In fact, it only gets harder the older I get. It really does hurt sometimes to be so sensitive. I truly believe deep down that this is a blessing rather than a curse to be ultra-different, even though most times it does not feel that way. Hang in there everyone, there is safety in numbers, even though our number is quite smaller than the masses.

  5. Fran June 28, 2017 at 7:54 am - Reply

    How has anyone found an answer or solution to this? I feel exactly as all the writers have expressed; but I’m only left with more questions and anxiety. I can’t even sleep anymore and I feel like a terrible mother I don’t know what to do anymore! These coincidences, my ex thinks I’m just flat out odd… I see things from such a different perspective and I pick up on people’s moods and energies so quickly it’s ridiculous. My mind fly’s faster than the speed of light and before anyone can say or do anything, I’ve already seen the entire scenario play out in my mind. I don’t know if it’s a blessing or a curse anymore. I can’t even help myself, which I think is the worse part. It’s like I’m just waiting, waiting….waiting.

  6. La Rae July 1, 2017 at 11:37 am - Reply

    Hi guys. Reading everyone’s story makes me feel so much better. I am an empath and I work with the public which I’m sure is a bad idea. I’ve struggled with fitting in my whole life. I’ve always felt like an outsider and I have a strange feeling that I don’t belong here. Kind of like I was sent to the wrong planet. My body is very sensitive to the foods I eat. So much that I have been considering becoming a raw vegan. I have visions of the future and they usually come to pass. I don’t understand why I’m here and I don’t like feeling alone. It feels like I’m just here temporarily waiting to die so I can go to my next destination.

  7. hesham July 2, 2017 at 12:33 am - Reply

    i agree with everything execpt we are animals, God created us

    • MB July 6, 2017 at 8:59 pm - Reply

      But he did not create the animals ?

    • b July 27, 2017 at 7:29 pm - Reply

      lol this god joke is still going strong 2000 years later?

  8. Rajeev July 9, 2017 at 7:30 pm - Reply

    Hi everyone , do you think there is a cure ?

  9. Jane July 10, 2017 at 5:19 pm - Reply

    I completely relate to everything in this article. The only difference is that I have unrelenting persecution in the mix to boot. I have lost everything and I am the hardest working person and am very caring, sympathetic and generous. Strangely the people I have helped most are the ones who turn around and stab you in the back. But it’s worse than that, I am literally surrounded by enemies. The ONLY thing that makes sense is what Jesus said “They hated me so they will hate you too.” We do not belong in this world. It is worse and worse the older I grow and there is nothing at all I can do to help myself – except to trust myself and God. The bible says it is by suffering and tribulation that we enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

    The Christian Prophet A. W. Tozer said that he told Dr Schuman, the President of the Christian and Missionary Alliance that he genuinely wanted to love God more than anyone ever had. Dr Schuman stared at him and said “Brother Tozer if that is the true desire of your heart, I have one word of caution ‘Prepare to suffer greatly'”.

    And that is so. I said something similar to an old Christian many years ago and he said “If you knew what was ahead of you, you would never go on” and he was right. The spiritual path is a path of suffering, it is not what he ‘new-agers’ teach at all. What Jesus said is true. Let’s hope all else he said was true too and then it will be worth it. Jesus and all the apostles died violent deaths at the hands of those who hated them. How do the new-agers explain that.

  10. Morgan July 24, 2017 at 10:44 am - Reply

    I feel similar to you guys. Like I fell off the boat and ended up here, while somewhere there, are the rest of my people. I watch coworkers, random people all the time and it looks like programmed robots, and I feel out of place, out of time, out of world. Everywhere I walk or drive, I swear I see the same people, the same faces, like I’ve done and seen this all before. I go someplace I’ve never been, or never eaten at, and I immediately feel like I’ve already done this. Movies I watch, I can see what’s coming. The only real satisfaction I get is when I am asleep, and I can go anywhere and do anything. While dreaming I feel like that’s the world I’m supposed to he in and when awake I am suffering. It’s painful mentally to pretend to care about pursuing the goals that are expected of me. Being awake is like being a slave to the system on a world I don’t belong in.

  11. Vnem August 13, 2017 at 1:16 pm - Reply

    I read every single comment. It’s exactly the same for me. I always had a social life but I was truly detached. It was like I was pretending all my life. Pretending to live, pretending to have friends, pretending to be in a relationship. Pretending to work. I am married with three kids I adore, but even now that I am 36, I can’t shake this feeling off. It’s like I dont belong here, like I’m from somewhere far away but I can’t remember where. I love music, travelling and art. Videogames, books and movies that show other worlds and I am imagining that I belong there. I love the stars, planets and Universe. I love seeing people healthy and happy, I adore children, they are the epitome of greatness and innocence and the fact that we live in a world where horrible things happen to them horrifies me and breaks my heart. I am highly perceptive to other people’s intentions and vibes. Like, really perceptive. I hate this whole negativity this world throws at me and others. I have really intense dreams that I travel to other worlds but I can never put my finger to. Never completely remember. I love helping others, making them smile, but I never want people become very close to me. Only a few special. I have never told anyone how I feel. Only my sister knows. My husband is a good man but thinks me as a weirdo. Thinks that I dislike people and I just have issues with the world and everyone around me because I can’t stand rudeness and negativity. He doesn’t know how I feel. He won’t understand. Homeopathy helped me deal with my depression in the past and still helps me discover my self and try to get along in this world I sometimes think I have been dumped to survive. What else can I do? Who will believe me when I say that every single time, and I mean EVERY SINGLE TIME I think of a favorite movie in tv, I d like to watch, I see it right in front of me? That I think things and they happen? That I understand right away what kind of people I have right in front of me, and that I have dreamed of thing that happened years afterwards?

  12. Yahnik H. August 20, 2017 at 7:56 pm - Reply

    I’ve been feeling ready to let go. I’m ready to letgo of all of my earthly possessions, family, and my body. I want to end this endless search and stop recycling my soul from body to body. I’m okay with dying because I know I’ll live in the next world in true peace. Peace is only temporary in this world and I’m tired to strive for something that’ll only be temporary and still fear losing that. I can still live this life with joyful moments but, none of it will matter in the next. I’m still young, 20, I thought maybe I’m giving up too soon but, I think I’ve been trying over and over for centuries to find a reason. I want to follow my instincts and act on my urges but, this world limits you, and with that I feel I have an Unfair disadvantage that’ll prolong my search for a period of time I’m just too tired to continue. I thank my spirit guide for their guidance and their help accommodating me to this life. My visions are too abstract to decipher, and my dreams aren’t clear enough to understand. Unfair disadvantages.

  13. asfia September 13, 2017 at 3:47 am - Reply

    i felt the same.. i think, not just a special person feel like this.. every person on this earth felt like this.. have you ever had an image of a beautiful scenery inside your head?.. whenever you felt like this world is not where you belong, that image flashing inside your head?.. i think, it’s because it’s from your previous life’s memory and it’s not your imagination..

  14. Jennobean September 14, 2017 at 10:50 am - Reply

    Wow. Look at how all of you that commented seem to want to fit in with each other based on categories and identification. I think you missed the point of the article and so, this might not apply to you.

  15. Maria September 15, 2017 at 2:46 am - Reply

    I can relate to all these comments, when I was in my 20’s and hung out with a few girls, I always felt left out like I had nothing to say or didn’t fit in the group. I stayed home a lot because of this reason, in elementary school I remember always sitting by myself and never wanting to make friends everyone thought that I was shy, but I knew there was something wrong. Even with my own family I feel that way like an outsider, I do not talk to my family only my mom, we really do not have anything in common. Now as a adult I hate being around people, at work I avoid going to lunch with co-workers, I only go to Christmas parties, because they make it mandatory and when I go I just sit there and observe, I make excuses to leave early. I always felt I was weird and did not belong, I would call myself a misfit.

  16. Christina September 20, 2017 at 12:07 pm - Reply

    I can identify with all of these. I have a strong sense of empathy and suffer from social anxiety. I have always felt as if I don’t belong and that I was born in the wrong time period/era. I feel I was born too early. I’m now 35 and these feelings have just intensified as time goes on. I feel drawn to certain places, especially ones with water. I can look at a photo and know where it is without ever having to of been there. I feel like I’m observing, not fitting in. I am an Introvert, I like my own time and hate going out. Even though I feel like I don’t fit in anywhere, not even with my own family, I’m actually fine with it. I’m just very curious as to why I feel all of this.

  17. Lisa September 21, 2017 at 5:27 am - Reply

    It wouldn’t be so bad if it felt good, but it doesn’t. It feels horrible. Over the course of my life (I’m 46 now) it has gotten worse and worse and I struggle to get through a day and make sense out of anyone. I don’t think it’s true that it means you are special and highly evolved. It sure isn’t because I’m so exceptionally brilliant. I think I was a mistake.

  18. Bob September 22, 2017 at 6:09 am - Reply

    These thoughts and feelings are exactly the way they’re supposed to be. It is up to you to accept this as a challenge, and strive to live each day as if it could be your last. Treat each person you encounter as a brother or a sister, and give them the best you can for the moments you have with them. You are the reflection of Christ to each and every other person you meet, and this is your purpose. You are in the world, but you are not of it, so focus on your mission: the people right in front of you! Don’t give up, and don’t give in to your loneliness. Keep your eyes forward and love them as Christ loves you! You can do this!

  19. Elizabeth Penman September 24, 2017 at 7:19 pm - Reply

    I can totally relate. I have woke up and seen through the veil of lies that we are all conditioned to accept as reality. This is not tbe truth but the majority of people blindly accept this.
    I spend a lot of time with animals and nature and have outgrown many if my earthly relationships. Do not despair though as you will gradually begin to attract other souls on the same path. I have found myself in a job with other spiritual people and it is a relief to find souls that I can relate to. They are out there !
    Peace love and harmony to you all.

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