I’m high functioning anxiety, and I am your worst nightmare. No, really, I am. I guess that makes a cute status on a social site, but the statement is true.
Anxiety is a condition that can be much worse than depression, mania or obsessive-compulsive disorder, all wrapped into one. Yes, I have this one too. For years, I felt the anxious monster rage through my body and mind, convincing me that nothing was good enough and worry was the answer. I had no clue how to tame this wild beast.
The hidden beast brings much worse torment.
Now, the scariest part about this topic is that anxiety can be hidden, and hidden well. It’s called high functioning anxiety, and it has the ability to camouflage even the worst episodes of “going crazy”. It can be harmless, but it can also be a ticking time bomb. Want to know how to tell when high functioning anxiety is at work? Check these out!
Covert tactics of the beast can be decoded.
You’re being anal.
Okay, stop giggling, I’m serious. Being anal retentive is one sure sign that someone has high functioning anxiety. I should know. I want things my way and in my timing, no later and perfect in detail. After all, anxiety will not allow for half-mast jobs.
You’re an Insomniac.
Yep, you guessed it! Being anxious keeps you up, sometimes all night and into the next day. And why? All those things you didn’t openly stress about come racing to the surface of your mind. There, they play ping-pong till you have a somewhat solution. Of course, you will have to run it by yourself again the next day. Sigh, it’s not easy.
Being busy can’t be that fun.
Instead of admitting that you have a problem, and you do, you rather convince everyone that you just love to work. According to you, nothing excites you quite like a good old full day’s work! Don’t pay any mind to those shaking hands and that twitching eye. That’s just how your body reacts to “fun.”
You are really sick.
Denial…denial…denial…yes, that’s you. You are sick, but yet you try to say anything to convince everyone else that you are perfectly fine.
Most of the time, you go out of your way to do it, thus making yourself stand out. Anxiety is not just a phase, it’s a problem. When high functioning anxiety is present, there will be loads of denial symptoms and characteristics.
You can’t reveal yourself.
High functioning anxiety is well-known for hiding true feelings. If you showed your emotion correctly, then the anxiety would clearly show, especially with negative feelings. It seems the only way to keep it hidden, is to hide your feelings as well. Those with this issue will seem cold and unfeeling, when in fact, they are packed full of turbulent thoughts.
“NO” does not exist.
One of the biggest indicators that you are hiding your anxiety is the inability to say NO. It doesn’t matter what the situation is, you try your hardest to say yes because you want to be helpful and loved. The desire to fit in is so strong that your convictions fail. You almost never use the word “no” in any circumstances. YES!, it’s true and YES it’s also sad.
It’s all a trick.
They all think your little eccentricities are cute, and I guess you have them fooled. That nail-biting, shifting and scratching is not so cute at all. Nerves are going haywire. As you hide things and as you play pretend, your little ticks get worse. If you have become an expert at hiding your anxiety, it will still show through in every little itch, tweak and jerk that bursts to the surface of your mentality.
My name is anxiety, your worst nightmare. I guess you get it now. High functioning anxiety is nothing to play with, and it can be worse than any other mental illness around. If you think losing your temper and lying in bed all day is the pits, then anxiety is a chasm. I know, and I deal with it every day of my life…sometimes functioning quite well.
Just remember that you are not alone. If you feel the need to hide your illness, think again. There are so many people who are understanding and willing to help you find healthy ways to deal with your disorder. Let’s try to do away with our covert tactics and open our hearts…open our minds…
And tear down the wall.