I know how tempting it is to vent about your problems, but maybe you should keep quiet about some things.
I get overwhelmed, I feel so alone sometimes, and I crave to tell someone what’s going on with me. The issues that I deal with are not simple things, they are situations that are incredibly difficult to understand and tolerate. But yet, I must keep quiet about some of these because not everyone needs to know my secrets.
It’s important to understand what’s shareable information and when you should keep quiet.
As humans, although we are surrounded by people every day, we are inherently alone. We are mostly alone in our thoughts, always pondering and working out situations in our heads – some more so than others. In the same instant, we don’t have to be alone, we have people who want to understand our plight and help us get through the tough times.
But it’s not that simple either. There is an even larger picture or maybe a more intricate way to look at this notion. We must categorize what we share with others. Some things are never meant to be shared while other things must be told in order to help the secret holder find peace and a solution.
There are many things that should be shared with family and loved ones, but there are also 6 things that you should always keep quiet about when interacting with not-so-close people. Take a look.
Some of the most notable things that you should keep quiet about are relationship problems. What goes on between you and your partner should be kept between you and your partner. It is tempting to tell someone about the problems that you have, but it can also cause even more problems.
Maybe it’s okay to tell some things, trivial things, but none of the heavy stuff. There should be no mention of your intimacy, arguments or various home life issues. The reason why you should keep quiet is because these complaints or comments are like open doors to other people. They invite others in to cause division – bad advice, stealing partners and even instigating violence.
Unfortunately, many relationships have suffered and ended due to outside intervention or betrayal. Need I say more?
2. Extended Family problems
This one may seem a bit more complicated, but bear with me. The extended family, which is the family aside from your spouse and children, consists of parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins, etc. There are many issues that arise between these members of the extended family. Property issues have become a recent problem which should never be discussed outside the involved parties.
There are also issues which involve inheritance, custody, and crime which should never pass from between affected members onto the ears of others within the family. This can only prove to be dangerous and dramatic. In some ways, information within the extended family can be some of the most critical topics that should never ever be leaked.
On the other hand, sharing information with your spouse and close members of the family can help you formulate a solution. Basically, this depends on your own personal discretion and judgment.
3. Medical information
Another sensitive topic concerns personal medical information. Under no circumstances should medical info be shared outside the family. Even some information should be kept in tight circles within the family. Sharing medical information, I believe, is illegal, and also immoral. People are often judged because of their illnesses and refused amenities like jobs and other positions of importance.
Many people have lost relationships due to untimely release of medical information as well. It should always be up to the sufferer to disclose this sort of thing. Illnesses, treatments, and diseases are things you should keep quiet about until there’s a dire need to know.
4. Hobbies or Passions
Even some of the things you love to do should be kept to yourself. For instance, only my partner knows my intimate secrets, and no one else should. Only he knows the quirky things I love to talk about in our private time and the things I enjoy that I kept hidden.
As far as hobbies go, not everyone needs to know how many times you enjoy your obsessions. It’s not vital that your friends and acquaintances understand why you love a certain sport or leisure activity. Without divulging what I really love to do, I will say that not everyone understands why I put on headphones and lie out on the grass to enjoy one of my favorite pastimes.
I will keep you guessing, and it’s not looking at the stars, mind you. It’s just no one’s business. But guess what, my partner knows and he even looks at me funny.
5. Fears and phobias
What I am afraid of is not any of your concern, really, it’s not. But I’m not trying to be mean or isolate myself from society, I’m just trying to get you to understand that not all things are meant to be divulged with everyone else. Although it may feel liberating, it can also be used against you. For instance, one of my ex-boyfriends found out that I had a particular fear, then when we broke up, he used that fear against me, causing further damage to my mental state.
If you fear something or you have a phobia, you should keep this to yourself. It’s not wrong to have a good healthy fear, but it’s not something that you should talk about. Not only does it give others an upper hand, but it also releases negative energies every time you talk about it.
The only time it should be mentioned is when you are faced with your fears in the company of your spouse or close family member. This can help them understand why you panic so that they can help out.
6. Your goals and dreams
Here is one more thing you should keep quiet about – your dreams and your plans for the future. These heartwarming thoughts should be kept safe within until you see them come to fruition. I will give you an example to help you understand why it’s a good idea to keep quiet about this.
Christian beliefs along with other spiritual ideas, suggest that speaking of what you are striving for can give the enemy something to target. In Christianity, revealing prayer gives satan something to try and destroy – thus the utilization of the “prayer language” as a way to disguise prayer requests. In other spiritualities, negative forces and energies will attack asperations, trying to replace positive desires with thoughts of failure and despondency.
Aside from the spiritual view, there is also scientific evidence in favor of the notion that you shouldn’t share your plans with others. A study found that those who talked about their goals with other people were less likely to achieve them.
It’s like keeping a gift hidden until it’s time to unwrap the present. Sharing your dreams only with close family is best.
So keep quiet. The best things come to those who… use discretion.
I bet you never considered some of these things before. Maybe you are just young and you trust too much. Well, it’s not necessarily about trust, as much as self-preservation. Try to keep quiet about some things in your life, the important things. Not everything is everyone’s business.
Keep that in mind.
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This Post Has 9 Comments
wish I read this earlier in life
Me too, Ruth. I still have such a problem with keeping my mouth shut. I will say, I am better than I was before.
Thank you, wise words 🙏
Thank you, sir. Working on this one really made me look within.
Honestly I see things from another perspective and I feel other solutions fit to me more, but I recognize your well structured and benevolent writing :)! Keep up the good work!
Im not going to speak unwantedly from now on and thank you
Wow, I’ve learnt alot on this one. Thanks!
I learn something huge from this article, thank you
i always keep my mouth shut