Are you about to enter into a relationship with an INTJ personality type? Do you want to know the truth when it comes to INTJ dating?

Here’s everything you need to know about INTJ dating and relationships.

INTJ’s and relationships

When it comes to relationships, someone with the INTJ personality type tends to be straightforward, direct and to the point. They are logical and independent types. They tend to be calm and detached when they communicate with their loved ones. This is because, despite their profoundly caring nature, they find it hard to express their deepest emotions.

INTJ’s want a partner that will stimulate them intellectually, challenge them and inspire them to be better. They can suss out someone who is not genuine a mile off. You cannot manipulate them, they simply don’t want to get involved in mind games. They value honesty and a direct approach.

INTJ’s think deeply before trusting a potential partner. They won’t commit unless they are sure.

INTJ Dating Rules

If you want to date an INTJ, there are simple rules to follow if you want it to go well:

INTJ Dating Dos

  • Keep your promises
  • Always be direct
  • Always be honest
  • Always try to be calm around them
  • Respect their wishes
  • Listen to what they are saying
  • Be proactive in a practical sense
  • Let them have some ‘alone time

INTJ Dating Don’ts

  • Don’t use mind games
  • Don’t mess them around
  • Don’t make a habit of turning up late
  • Don’t try and get them to open up too early
  • Don’t ask them to socialize too much
  • Never lie to them
  • Don’t get angry with them

INTJ’s and Relationships

INTJ’s choose their partners with military precision. They will weigh up the pros and cons and make a decision. Typically they’ll have a list of desired qualities and a very clear idea about the type of relationship they want. They won’t settle for second best. They will not put up with an abusive partner, or a partner that doesn’t allow them to be independent.

INTJ’s want a solid relationship that will stand the test of time. They like to be married and take their vows very seriously.

Now, once in a relationship, an INTJ is fiercely loyal. They support their partner’s goals and encourage them to be the best they can be. In return, they expect the same.

Quite often you’ll find that to an INTJ, their perfect relationship allows them to swap roles with their partner so they can follow their intellectual goals. Their ideal partner will then swap back and they can then pursue their dreams. For instance, a husband could take on more work to allow his wife to study to become a teacher.

It is this deep level of supporting their partners that constitutes love in the INTJ’s eyes. They are not ones for PDA’s or unnecessary displays of affection. Their love revolves around encouraging and backing their loved ones. Kind of like ‘Us against the world’.

Relationships with an INTJ

It can be difficult dating an INTJ. Despite being extremely straightforward and direct, they can be incredibly difficult to reach on an emotional level. To an INTJ, talking about their deepest emotions almost feels distasteful and impolite. They prefer solving practical problems. Emotions are just too unpredictable.

Therefore, expect a slow start with an INTJ. They are romantically awkward and never initiate the first move. They are confident in fields they excel in but not in areas of romance and emotions. You might have to pry them out of their shell a few times but do persevere because they are worth it.

So how do INTJ’s fare with other personality types?

INTJ Dating and Their Compatibility with Other Personality Types

INTJ’s are compatible with other MBTI personality types, but which ones?

Most compatible

  • INTJ
  • ISTJ
  • INTP
  • ISFP

These are the types that INTJ’s feel most comfortable with.

INTJ – Of course, an INTJ will find another INTJ most attractive as they are exactly the same. Sharing identical qualities means they know precisely where they are with each other.

ISTJ – These are practical, responsible and private people. These traits appeal to an INTJ.

INTP – It is the intellectual and socially awkward side that draws the INTJ to this type.

ISFP – Sensitive and nurturing, this type wants to create a caring environment, something the INTJ loves.

Slight Differences

  • INFP
  • INFJ
  • ISFJ
  • ISTP

These personality types are the next best thing for INTJs. There may be some little differences but nothing that can’t be worked out.

INFP – These are sensitive souls but might be a little too idealistic for practical INTJ’s.

INFJ – Another type that values intellect, however, their tendency to focus on the past could be off-putting.

ISFJ – This type represents everything an INTJ could wish for. The problem is, because they are very private about their good nature, they often go unnoticed.

ISTP – INTJs will notice this type getting on with tasks and achieving their goals. This might intimidate them at first, but it shouldn’t put them off completely.

Potential Growers

  • ESTP
  • ESTJ
  • ENFP
  • ENTJ

These types will be slow growers and there might not be an initial attraction. Give it time and there could be potential.

ESTP – The INTJ will marvel at how easy this type appears to solve problems. They will be attracted to their unconventional lifestyle but not feel brave enough to follow it.

ESTJ – A traditional type that values loyalty, which the INTJ will definitely approve of. They could be put off by the ESTJ’s outgoing personality.

ENFP – Everyone is drawn to the type, they are the life and soul of the party! INTJ’s are no less smitten. If they can see past the extrovert exterior, they’ll find a caring person.

ENTJ – Most INTJ’s will rail against the way this type takes charge as they are fiercely independent. Their logical nature might win them over, however.

Complete Opposites

  • ESFP
  • ESFJ
  • ENTP
  • ENFJ

ESFP – This is an INTJ’s worse nightmare. The ESFP loves being spontaneous, likes surprises, being sociable, everything the INTJ hates.

ESFJ – This type is simply too tiring as they like to be on the go all the time. They will wear out an INTJ in no time.

ENTP – INTJs will enjoy the challenges this type presents. However, their enthusiasm will soon drain them.

ENFJ – This type will charm the hardest of INTJs, but in the end, their constant need for contact with others will prove to be too much.

How much do you agree with this assessment of INTJ dating? Let us know!



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